In common jokes
What does an orphan and a wheelchair have in common?
They can both be replaced.
What does Buzz Lightyear and an orphan's parents have in common?
They go to infinity and beyond.
What does a pencil and a plan have in common?
They were both in the Twin Towers.
What does a gun and gum have in common?
When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.
What does the plane that hit the Twin Towers and milk have in common?
My dad went to get both and never came back.
What do a 100-year-old pornstar and The White Stripes have in common? Icky Thump!
What do visiting Goatman's Bridge and a bungee jumping accident have in common?
You hear a snap, and suddenly you're falling from a bridge.
What do orphans and apples not have in common? Apples get picked.
What do phones and orphans have in common?
They selfie! (It's because they don't have parents.)
What do a blonde chick and a field of wheat have in common?
They're both bound to get plowed at some point in time.
What do cake and baseball have in common?
Both need batters.
What do Philippe Petit and New York citizens have in common?
They both walk(ed) over the Twin Towers.
What do a blonde chick and a turtle both have in common?
When they're on their backs, they're screwed.
What does a kite and a criminal have in common?
They both get high.
What do a 14-year-old pregnant girl and the child inside her have in common?
Both are thinking, “Oh no! My mom’s gonna kill me!”
What does a nearsighted gynaecologist and a puppy have in common?
Wet noses.
What do a blind kid and an orphan have in common?
They can’t see their parents.
What does a pregnant slave and a "pay less" sale have in common?
Buy one, get one free.
What do nail polish and panties have in common?
Both come off with alcohol.
What do orgasms and impulses have in common?
I don’t care if they have either of them.