If jokes
Is it classed as down under if you eat out an Australian chick?
Do you play Sea of Thieves? See if these balls fit in your mouth, gotteeeem!
If 7, 8, 9, why was 10 afraid?
It was between 9/11.
Sonic says if you're bored, go punch an orphan. I mean, what are they going to do, tell their parents?
People shouldn't worry about how orphans would feel reading these jokes. It's not like they have parents to buy them a phone or computer to see them, or even a place to charge them even if they did have one.
If you execute someone in ventricular fibrillation in the electric chair, will they come back to life once and then die?
If you feel a lump in your rice, you fucked up.
If you feel a lump in your skin, you have cancer.
If a gay person is vegan, how does he have sex? He will keep getting meat stuck in his ass and in his throat.
If my son was a real man, I wouldn't have caught him fucking another man.
So I told an orphan if her mom is hot, he wouldn't stop crying.
When I was 11, my mom came home from the bar super drunk that night, and I just wanted to know if they knew where the cat was because I heard a noise. We had a loooooooong talk the next morning.
One day I seen a little boy walking in the grocery store, so I asked if he was okay, and he said yes. I asked where his parents were, and he said his mom died years ago and his dad is stuck in the milk aisle.
And I blame it on the al-al-al-cohol, but if I were you, I wouldn’t kiss your mom on the mouth at all.
I heard my neighbors having sex, and it was annoying me, so I called my girlfriend to ask if she wanted to go out, but when I called her, I heard my neighbors' phone ringing.
I think if the center of the earth froze, it would be pretty hard core.
Never drink tea in school... I give people tea if they've passed out... tea can be nice, but only have it once a day... It's not what you think... It's not tea, it's CPR.
What would Martin Luther King be if he was white? Alive.
If your kid beats up an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Like, if you hate wearing a mask.
Every time I'm out in public, and I see someone without their mask, I always feel like there is something extra special about them. Then I realize that I can see all their face!
True story by the way.
So a mom went to her kid and said, "If you pray to God, He will give you your sight back." So he did exactly that.
The next morning, the mom heard a scream, so she went to the kid's room and asked, "What's wrong?" The kid replied, "It didn't work!" The mom said, "April Fools!"