Q. What's the difference between pizza and an emo?
A. The pizza doesn't cut itself.
Son: Dad, I have black skin and you have white skin, are you sure you're my parents?
Dad: Oh... well I never thought it would come to this, or to your head that you were kidnapped...
Son: Am I kidnapped?
Dad: Well, you're adopted, and if you want to see your biological parents, they’ll be waiting for you in heaven.
What do you call a black person with a pride flag? A Cosmic Brownie.
What do you call five Black people having sex?
Threesome.
How do you know it’s a gay guy’s birthday?
Depends how hard they blow out the candles.
Why are most vacuums gay?
They’re always coming out of the closet.
Why [does] a tranny say "Have a good day" to a Jew?
He [is a] goy.
Why do trans women make the best golf course grounds staff?
They’re enthusiastic about getting rid of unwanted balls.
What do you call a white guy who can actually dance? Jewish.
I’m so straight, you could call me a supplementary angle.
How do non-binary people kill people?
They slash them.
The best way to tell a Hindu person and a Muslim person apart is asking them:
"Are you 7-Eleven or 9/11?"
One time my dad was an orphan, so I questioned where he learned to parent.
There is a Mexican, white guy, a Jew, and a Black man on top of the Empire State Building.
First, the Mexican and the Jew throw themselves off of the building saying, "This is for my people!"
Then the Black man is next up to jump and says, "This is for my people!"
And throws the White man off of the building.
What do you call a gay pride parade that was ran over?
Rainbow road.
What's the LGBTQ+'s favorite cereal?
Fruity Pebbles.
What’s another term for a lesbian?
A vagetarian.
What do you call an LGBTQ+ plane?
A biplane.
Why is it that a physically disabled gay white male will refuse to ask his boss that is an abled bodied gay white male for an increase in his paycheck?
Since he has a very big white dick in his mouth, that could be the reason why.
A pedophile and a priest run a race.
You can’t beat yourself in a race!