Identity jokes
You can’t say “dwarf” anymore; you have to say “little people”.
You can’t say “fat”; you have to say “plus size”.
You can’t say “retard”; you have to say “democrat”.
Why did Severus Snape cross the road wearing an invisibility cloak?
So no one would know what side he was on.
How come you never see a gay person in a wheelchair?
It’s hard to be a fruit, when you’re already a vegetable.
What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common?
There used to be two, but now it's a sore subject.
Why can’t trans men enjoy chocolate?
It uses Hershey pronouns.
What do you call a fat transgender midget?
Jigglypuff.
I’d make fun of transgender women, but that’s low hanging fruit.
Opal didn't hack RapBoat's account, she WAS RapBoat the whole time.
"Explain bear is a homosexual, confirmed."
I met a lovely girl at a friend's house party, so I went and introduced myself by saying I'm Noah, what's yours?
She turned around angrily and offended and said, "I identify as a hockey puck, didn't you see the sign?"
To which I replied, "Bitch, that says hickey puck. If you identify as a hockey puck, then let me hit you!"
I met a lovely girl at a friend's house party, so I went and introduced myself by saying I'm Noah, what's yours?
She turned around angrily and offended and said, "I identify as a hockey puck, didn't you see the sign?"
To which I replied, "Bitch, that says hickey puck. If you identify as a hockey puck, then let me hit you!"
Looking in the mirror, I don’t need a therapist, god damn, I wanna be a terrorist.
Did you hear about the Syrian guy that shot a bunch of people? He was Robert Kurd.
What does the + sign stand for in LGBTQ+?
It’s the premium version of gay.
A black Jewish boy runs home from school one day and asks his father, “Daddy, am I more Jewish or more black?” The dad replies, “Why do you want to know, son?” “Because a kid at school is selling a bike for $50 and I want to know if I should talk him down to $40 or just steal it!”
What did the trans woman say after finally telling her parents about her surgeries?
“It felt really good to get that off my chest.”
Devora Malka, the Nora School, Silver Springs, Maryland, also known as Opal.
What do you call a bus full of transgender men? T-Mobile.
How do you restrain a straight person? Give them a straight jacket.
How do you restrain a trans person? Make the trans vest tight.
Who was the most successful transgender and transracial person in history?
Michael Jackson. He grew up a poor, black boy, and died a rich, white woman.