What do you call an obese man with bipolar? Twins.
Ur mom gay, lol.
Adopted kid: I made a big mistake!
Dad: You are one.
Why does God hate me?
Because I'm a gay minority who fights for women's rights.
Why did C.S.C. fail the trigonometry test?
Cosecant remember his own name.
Mwahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
What if Stephen Hawking was the Real Slim Shady, but no one knew because he couldn't stand up?
Who am I sitting next to?
Oof, you're gay!
What do you call a man with no body and no nose?
No Body Knows.
No body nose.
What do you call a man with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows. No body, nose.
The twin towers are like genders, there used to be two of them.
You're gay.
Ur dad lesbian.
Ur sister a mister.
Ur family tree LGBT.
Ur family reunion a homosexual communion.
Beau Ruse is Gay.
A cell phone in an upscale gym locker room in NYC rings and the man puts it on loud speaker next to him. Everyone else in the room stops to listen:
Man: Hello? Woman: Hi honey, it's me. Are you at the club? Man: Yes. Woman: I’m out shopping and found a beautiful leather coat. It’s only $2,000 – is it OK if I buy it? Man: Sure, go ahead if you like it that much. Woman: I also stopped by that new Lexus dealership and saw one of the new models I really like – it’s on an opening special. Man: How much? Woman: $90,000. Man: Wow! OK, but for that price I want it with all the options. Woman: Great! Oh, and one more thing... I was just talking to Jamie and found out that the house we wanted to buy last year is back on the market... they’re asking $980,000 for it. Remember it was well over a million when we looked at it? Man: I dunno. Make an offer for $900,000 and they’ll probably take it. If not, we can go the extra $80,000 if that’s what you really want. Woman: OK. I’ll see you later! I love you so much! Man: I love you to.
The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room were staring at him in astonishment, mouths wide open.
The man turns around and says: “Anyone know whose phone this is?”
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lickalotofpuss.
Mathew is gay. Clap.
Black dog is gay.
One day, in the Serengeti, a zebra started wondering if he was a white horse with black stripes, or a black horse with white stripes. So he goes around asking all the animals. He never gets his answer.
One fateful day, he dies and goes to Heaven. In Heaven, the zebra gets an idea. "I will go ask God!" So, he asks God, and God chuckles. "You are what you are!"
The zebra gets sad. He walks around and his dead zebra friend shows up. He asks, "What is wrong?" The zebra answers, "Well, I asked God if I was either a white horse with black stripes, or a black horse with white stripes. He just replied 'You are what you are!'"
His friend says, "Oh! You are a white horse with black stripes! Why? Because he would have said 'You is what you is!'"
Once a cheetah, always a cheetah.
