Hygiene jokes

Politicians and diapers have one thing in common: they should both be changed regularly... and for the same reason.

Trump and Biden didn’t get the memo.

Bro, tampons look like sperms, and they go up your coochie.

How can toilet paper decorate your house?

Shit sticks everywhere.

Yo mama is so fat, they had to flood the Super Bowl to give her a bath.

Don't you just hate it when your grandmas always complaining about things getting stuck between her false teeth, like my foreskin?

Enyaw’s fanny smells of dirty, moist, fishy, rotten egg, dead Elizabeth, pig dick, cow cum filth.

Dirty bitch!

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?

To get to the bottom.

PERSON: I need to go so bad!

TOILET: Long time no pee!!!

What’s the difference between a prostitute and a hockey player?

A hockey player gets to shower after three periods.

Do you know the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain?

So you're the one!

So, I took a poop outside. When I was done, I wiped and got it on my finger. After that, I had Nutella, and I thought the poop on my hand was Nutella, and I licked it. I said, "Daddy chill, what in the heck is this crap?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

What's worse than sucking a dozen raw oysters out of your grandmother's cunt?

Putting in 12 and sucking out 13.

Do you know you’re supposed to wash your sex toys after you use them?

I guess that’s why Catholics invented baptism.

Singing in the shower is fun, until you get soap in your mouth.

Then it's a soap opera.

Yo mama so fat, she uses a mattress as a diaper.

Why was the homeless lady only wearing one sock?

She started her period.

Last time I got a piece of ass was when my finger went through the toilet paper.

What does gum in my d*ck have in common?

Both get chewed on by little kids.

Why do lesbians get their belly button pierced?

So they have a place to hang the air freshener.

Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs?

So you can tell them apart from the feminists.