Humor
Sell PC.
Go to Croatia.
Try to fly to the US to meet female.
US won't let me in.
End up in Norway.
Female leaves me.
Female gets arrested by feds.
Feds read all my messages and see my dick pics.
Just another day in the defib life.
How did the emo kid compliment the other emo kid? He said, "I like your cuts G."
What do you call a gay guy eating Cheerios?
Fruit Loops.
Who said white people can't jump?
Look at the footage from 9/11.
I'm black, and I have a dying family in my basement that hasn't eaten in 2 weeks. They need help.
Btw, it's a joke lol.
in (DYM 95)
My dad told me a joke one time. When I realized the joke, the second tower was hit.
Yo momma's like a cloud, when she disappears, it's a beautiful sunny day.
I was at a concert in the front row, and I shouted something to the band's guitarist. He took it the wrong way and responded: "I'm going to go down there and hit you with my guitar!"
And I replied: "Is that a death fret?"
What’s the difference between a WNBA player and a rotten apple? The apple has a chance to make it into the basket.
Why is the Reaper not funny at all?
Well, he tells dead jokes!
Why can't England play Clash, Chess, or Checkers?
Because they lost their queen.
When a kindergarten teacher asks a kid to sing the alphabet, he said "ab3defg." The teacher said, "Do you like 3D?" He said, "Yeah." The teacher yelled, "Okay, do you have a 3DS?" He said yes. The teacher goes into his bag and says, "Say ABCs or your 3DS will be destroyed." He says, "ab3defghijlmnopqrs." "Oh, he learned well." The teacher threw the 3DS out the window. The kid gets it, and it still works. Then he googles ABCs. It goes to YouTube and says, "abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz." The teacher is proud of the 3DS. The class went home telling parents.
Hey, Squidward, say "kid" backward. Also, suck my dick!
Hey, 2nd Amendmenters! Wanna know what gun Jesus used during his time?
What?
A nail gun!
Technically speaking, "ur mom/ur father" jokes have no effect on orphans.
How many times do you tickle a squid before it laughs?
TEN-TICKLES
What did the pedestrian say after he saw the twin towers fell?
JENGA!!!!
What do you call an autistic kid with a rocket ship? A cocker.
Yo hairline so bent even Bob the Builder can’t fix it!