Jon said: What do you call a pregnant woman?
Mike said: I don’t know, what?
Jon said: Kinder surprise.
Humor
Can February march?
No, but April may.
Your momma's so dumb, she took her driving lesson on a dinosaur.
One time there was a depressed man standing in the middle of a train track. A girl said, "Excuse me, can you move, please? I'm trying-" Then the man stopped her sentence and said, "How is your t-shirt so clean?" Then she said back, "Easy, hung it up."
Husband: Hey honey, words can’t describe how beautiful you are.
Wife: Aww, thanks.
Husband: But numbers can. 0 out of 10.
Wife: (on phone) Hi. Husband: Hey, I didn’t know dishwashers talk and make me a sandwich.
Man walks into a bar and sees a bear serving drinks... Sits down looking astonished. The bear says, "what's the matter you never saw a bear serving drinks?" The man says, "it's not that, I just never thought the moose would sell the place."
Orphans are human, too! They just don't know who their parents are or where! I know four sisters named Mariah, Kariah, Lariah, and Iariah and they said they are orphans, too! And they are sad and they don't like your jokes!
Orphans are human too! They have parents like all of us, so I don't know why they're saying it's fun to make fun of an orphan. Have you ever been too cold and wondered if your parents are going to have another child and not you? That's not funny! It is %9000,000 NO!!!!!!!!!!
Who is Joe?
You reply back: Who is Candice?
They reply back: Who is Candice?
You say: "Candice nuts fit into Joe Mama's mouth."
What did the traffic light say to the truck?
"Don't look, I'm about to change!"
If I'm ugly, at least I'm not you.
What do you call a man with no hands? Clapless.
What's the motto for a pizza place that's also an abortion clinic: Your loss is our sauce.
As an Autist, I find these jokes really funny. Thanks for the early 13th birthday present, ya'll :>
I don't always like to tell dwarf jokes. But when I do, I like to keep them short.
You might think these jokes are plane.
Me at the Anti-Orphan Jokes convention. 💣🗡🔪🧨🔫
What do you call a group of chubby trans-genders?
Trans-fats.
What happens when skeletons score points in a game?
They get a bone-us.
