A depressed guy walks into a bar and says, "Can I get shot?"

The bartender then says, "You mean, can you get a shot, right?"

The bartender then says, "Well... what drink would you like?"

The depressed guy then responds with, "No, I really want to get shot."

This isn't a joke, but I'm a survivor and use humor to cope. I find these extremely funny, so please leave the people writing these alone 😭

What was the orphan's name?

Jake! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂🤣🤣😂🤣🤣😂😂

What's the same about a newborn and a football?

You can kick them both very easily.

It's not funny to joke about orphans. Without any education, they'd never understand what the jokes mean.

This joke is unavailable due to the National Period of Mourning. Please return to this page on the 19th of September.

R.I.P. Queen Elizabeth II. 1926-2022.

I got banned from the library for putting a book about woman's rights in the fantasy section.

What's the difference between Monday and a dick?

They're not different. They're both unnecessarily long and hard.

What's better: nailing Jesus or getting nailed?

Depends on who's sucking.

This humor is so dark, it's darker than the Black population.