how are fortnite cards and orphans similar: theyre given away
Man: How do you prepare your chicken? Waiter: Nothing special, we just tell them they’re going to die.
How did the Emo kid bag all the cheerleaders? He hit them all when he started shooting his shot
How is slavery different from Pokémon? The types you can have
How did Rihanna find out? Chris Brown was cheating on her Found another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
How does Hellen Keller meet men? She goes on blind dates.
What record did Obama proved during his presidency No matter how far a brotha gets in life he’ll still be in government housing
If a man travels 14 miles to buy a loaf of bread, how long will it take for him to realise that living in the countryside is shit?
How to catch Bigfoot: 1. Dig a large pit. 2. Build a fire in the pit and let it burn all the way to ashes. 3. Place small green peas all around the rim of the pit. 4. Hide in the bushes and wait. When Bigfoot goes to take a pea, kick him in the ash hole.
How do rappers stay warm in the winter?
They drop FIRE TRACKS
“Poor old fool,” thought the gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. He invited the old man inside for a drink. The gentleman asked, “So how many have you caught today?
”The old man replied, “You’re the eighth.”
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
How is a priest like a wristwatch They both start at 12
What did the cops say when someone called him racist?
How can I be racist my wife’s eye is black
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
My wife wanted a boob job. I told her it was too expensive. I told her all she has to do is take some toilet paper and rub it in between her boobs for a few days, and they would get bigger. She asked "How is that supposed to work?". I replied, "I don't know how it works, but it did a heck of a job on your ass!"
Two guys watching a war movie at a Bar are talking , one says to the other. " The Nazi's starved my dad to death in a concentration camp during the war". The other says " my Dad died in a camp as well...he broke his neck" First guy says " how did he break his neck?" Second guy says " He fell out of the Guard Tower".
A blonde walks into the Doctors office. She tells the Doctor, " My boyfriend has dandruff". The Doctor tells her to use Head and Shoulders. She leaves. About an hour later, the Doctors phone rings. He answers, its the Blonde. The Doctor asks how he can help her. " Well Doctor, I understand head, but how do you hove shoulders?"...........
A man is talking to his doctor after undergoing a whole range of tests to try and find out what’s wrong with him.
The doctor sits him down and says, “I’m so sorry to have to tell you this. But the results are back, and I’m afraid it’s fatal.”“Oh no!” exclaims the man, “How long do I have?”
“Ten,” says the doctor.
“What, years? Months?!”
“Nine...”
