Hows jokes
How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two, but they're very tiny and we're not sure how they got in there.
How many poets does it take to change a light bulb?
One to curse the darkness, one to light a candle.
How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to pull a permit, one to schedule the inspector, and one to change the bulb.
How many bisexuals does it take to change a light bulb?
Depends, are you AC or DC? However many turn you on.
How would negotiations between Putin and Zelensky play out?
QUEUE THE MUSIC
BANG BANG INTO THE ROOM I KNOW U WANT IT
How do pigs kill themselves?
They commit Kermit-cide.
You know how 6 was afraid of 7 because 7 8 9?
Well, how do you think 10 feels being in the middle of 9 11?
How does a pimp answer when asked why he chose his occupation?
Answer: He wanted a stable source of income.
How do terrorists feed their babies?
"Here comes the aeroplane!"
Akbar: How many crows are there, Birbal?
Birbal: 8,971.
Akbar: What if there are fewer?
Birbal: Then some crows went on vacation to visit their relatives.
Akbar: What if there are more?
Birbal: Then some came on vacation here to visit their relatives.
How can you tell what kind of emo you are?
By how deep the cuts are on your forearm.
How many Joe Biden jokes are there?
None, because they're all true.
How are Jews and potatoes different?
A potato keeps its skin.
How many optometrists does it take to change a light bulb?
One (flips lens) or two? One (flips another lens) or two?
How many audio engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
One, two. One, TWO. One, two. One, two.
How many Bay Street bankers does it take to change a light bulb?
In Toronto? One to hold it up and expect the entire country to revolve around them.
How many Lawrence Welk fans does it take to change a light bulb?
"A one, and ah two."
How can you never find a hippo hiding behind a weed?
Because they're so good at it.
How many bankers does it take to change a light bulb?
Four—one to hold the bulb and three to try to remember the combination.
How many police officers does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. They wait for it to turn itself in.