Hows jokes
What’s the difference between me and Chester Bennington?
I know how to use an exercise band.
How can you tell a bow n' arrows scared?
He starts to quiver! ;)
So I meet with a therapist on a weekly basis. We talk about my depression and how it's been getting worse. Recently, I've been advised about my condition, and how I've been discussing with her about being suicidal. She's been very helpful throughout it. I was even told I can pay in advance from now on, so I don't have to worry about it later.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
How come the toilet paper could not make it across the road?
Because of the Corona Virus.
A nucleus walked into a bar. He asked the bartender, “How much for a drink?” The bartender replied, “For you, NO CHARGE!”
How do you get a depressed girl to suck your dick?
Pour bleach on it.
Why can’t I drive? 'Cuz my dad never showed me how, yet.
How do orphans have a family reunion? They look in the mirror.
How do you know Thor has your back?
He's an Asgardian (ass guardian).
How can toilet paper decorate your house?
Shit sticks everywhere.
How do I feed the baby with my pants on?
How do you eat a cake?
With a fork!
A kid asks his father, "How long is our trip, Dad?"
The kid's father says, "Our trip is a Fortnite."
I see how it is y’all be buying toilet paper, stocking up from the Coronavirus, but where on the symptoms does it say diarrhea? Lol, why y’all be buying toilet paper, now I am just confused.
Wood fired pizza?
How's pizza gonna pay child support now?! :O
Please drop a like.
How does a peadophile help a kid with maths? He adds the bed, divides the clothes, and multiplies with the whole classroom.
How are shark eggs and your mom the same? They're both the biggest thing ever laid.
How do you make an elephant float?
One elephant, two scoops of ice cream, and a lot of root beer!
My dad came over late at night. He was drunk. He started telling me how useless I was. Then I went to the kitchen, grabbed a knife, and stabbed him in the chest 47 times.
Three minutes later, he died. Now I’m losing my mind and cutting myself.