Titanic hit a dimetrodon.
History Jokes
Titanic didn't sink by an iceberg.
Titanic sank by 100000000000000000000000 Titanics.
(everyone on Titanic) Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh, the ship will sink!!!!
(person washing hands) I'm using the sink, wait your turn!!!!!
(all crew members laugh) Hahahhahahahahah.
(Titanic ll) yeah boyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy :) (iceberg) ok at least there isn't 99 more titanics (99 more titanics pop up) yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh boy:) (iceberg) :(
Abraham Lincoln was a good man, he jumped out the window with his dick in his hand and walked up to a group of ladies and said I'm doing my duty so why don't you give me some booty?
My grandpa killed 100 German soldiers; he was the worst German pilot ever.
What do you call a man who offended an NFL player...
Odin Floyd.
What’s the difference between Jesus and a plank of wood?
A plank of wood can take nails to the extremities without screaming.
What do you call a lesbian Dinosaur?
Lickalotapuss.
Me dozing off while driving.
Everyone else on the passenger plane: September 11, 2001.
You know Hitler loves you when he comes up to you on Valentine's Day and he says, "Will you be my Valenein?"
Shame on King Tut! Tsk-tsk!
My grandpa was amazing. He killed Hitler.
Do you know how to confuse Helen Keller?
Put her in a room and tell her to find the corner.
What if the ocean just raided Titanic of its people? Like instead of it flooding, it was raiding it and threatened the passengers if they told, so they just said an iceberg flooded the ship.
Iran: We can beat the USA.
Japan: You do realize we beat him in Battleship, and he dropped the sun on us.
Iran: So?
Japan: Twice!
Do you know why God created wars? To teach Americans geography.
So, every time I walk in the door, my kid shuts his laptop. So, I check his history. It was good, but my wife checked mine, and she didn't say the same. The words I heard were, "Get out!"
Slavery and discipline, it's kind of the same thing. You get whipped for doing the wrong thing.
What did Hitler say to Stan after he died?
I did nazi that coming!
