Immigration jokes
Immigration jokes just cross the line.
I may not be as "rich" as Donald Trump, but at least I am still allowed to go on holiday to Bali, Niagara Falls, Hong Kong, and the Pyramids of Giza.
Orange Jesus can't travel to these places because these places cannot grant entry to felons.
...ah, who am I kidding? It's likely that Trump is going to prison, anyway.
What's the difference between a Mexican and a frog?
One jumps in ponds, the other leaps over the border. :)
If there are 4 Mexicans in a van, which of them is driving?
None of them. Immigration service is.
If an illegal immigrant fights against a child molester, would that be "Alien vs Predator"?
Why can't Mexicans cross the border? They always sneak powder in.
Why can’t you play Uno with Mexicans?
Because they’ll steal all the green cards.
Hispanic and Latino people be like, "No more immigrants!" Like, dude, aren't you an immigrant?
What's the difference between Mexicans and stoners? Stoners actually have papers.
Why can't Mexicans play Uno? Because they steal all of the green cards.
Why can't you play Uno with a Mexican? Because they'll steal all the green cards.
What is a Mexican's least favorite type of water?
I.C.E. water.
What do you call a child predator and an illegal immigrant? Alien vs. Predator.
Australia needs YOUR help!
ISIS brides are coming to Australia! They need to go back to where they came from. Help us before they blow us up like the terrorists they are!
What sport are Mexicans the best at?
Cross country.
Why don't Indians play baseball?
Every time they reach a corner, they make a shop.
Donald Trump didn't even finish the wall. He should have hired Mexicans to do it!
Why don’t Mexicans have an Olympic team? Because everyone who can run, jump, and swim are in the USA.
In the beginning of the 20th century, a young girl called Edit left her home country of Sweden and crossed the Ocean to make a new life in America. Unfortunately, it did not go all that well, and she soon found herself homeless, begging for food or money to survive.
She used to occupy a street next to a theater, not because it meant hefty handouts, but because it was a place where no other beggars or police bothered her. Every night, a new crowd came to see a show, and the cute young girl found just enough mercy to survive. In fact, she did so well that she decided to afford herself a small piece of cake every Tuesday, just to keep her spirits up.
One Tuesday, she could not get a break. Looked like she will go without cake this week. Then, a strange-looking gentleman stopped near her. He soon heard her story and decided to share his fortune.
Gentleman: "I work as a magician in the touring show; today, we performed here. Some nights, our guests want to gamble with us afterwards, and I make sure to bring home more than I came with. I try to keep it moderate, but today, this obnoxious drunk was loaded, so I emptied his pockets. Here, take this precious coin."
The interviewer asked me if I had a criminal record when I was requesting Australian citizenship.
I replied, "No. Is that still required?"