Him jokes

This kid was crying, so I asked him where his parents were. He just cried harder. I still remember him every time I pass that orphanage.

I was digging outside and I found my child's old toy, so I ran to find him, but I could not find him, so I was searching for about 6 hours, but then I remembered why I was digging......

Jim was caught beating a man up. Brooklyn took a picture of his license plate with her phone and told him, "Your life is ruined!" So Jim took a picture of her, and the next thing you know, he said, "Now my phone is ruined!"

I saw a kid crying and asked him where his parents were. He started crying harder.

The ungrateful brat. I see why he is an orphan.

Went to the doctor, told him I've been having dreams, first about a wigwam, then about a teepee. He said I was too tense.

When the bully says, "You're adopted," so you hit him with, "At least someone wanted me!"

So I went to my friend's house and he told me to make myself at home, so I kicked him out. I don't like visitors.

Anakin Skywalker: I don't like sand.

*also him*

Anakin Skywalker: I lived on sand.

Why is Stephen Hawking not scared of anyone?

His wheelchair always backs him up.

I caught my wife cheating on me.

I beat my son and grounded him.

Me and my friend roasting each other.

Him: Your dad dropped you on purpose, but my dad dropped me by accident.

Me: But after dropping you, he never picked you up.

If my son was a real man, I wouldn't have caught him fucking another man.

Why does Aaron like men? Because his dad beats him.

An Emo walked up to a tree and put his hand up for a high-five.

But the tree left him hanging.

Why is the orphan sad for dinner?

He has no one to eat with at the table.

I met a baseball player, so I told him to make a home run, and he just looked at me with sadness. I don't know why.

By the way, he was an orphan.

I saw an orphan on the road. I asked him if he's an orphan. The kid says, "Yeah, what gave it away?"

I say, "Your parents."

A cop pulls me over and asks if I have been drinking.

I'm an honest person and say yes, I did, so I take off my sunglasses and tell him that I now had 2 glasses less.

I saw a kid with no phone. I gave him an iPhone 14.

Except it had no home button.

TJ's hairline is so far back, his friends don't even want to talk to him.