Him jokes

I was at the orphan place, and I saw a kid crying. And I asked him where his parents are, and he fainted.

I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire.

Now we call him hot wheels.

Why does Aaron chug beer on a Wednesday?

Because his dad beats him every single day because he has scoliosis.

How did the flapjack feel when syrup was drizzled on him?

Butter.

I brought a cow and named him Mayo.

Mayo Neighs!

A man goes for a pee in a haunted house.

He unzips his pants at the urinal when a man dressed as a goblin chuckles next to him. "You got a small dick, buddy," the man says to him.

I saw a small kid crying, so I asked him, "Where's your mom?" but he started crying, so I left the funeral. 🙂🙂

A dog found a bone. Then he was walking happily across the street, and he saw a bridge. He decided to walk on the bridge. He saw his reflection and thought it was another dog. Then he barked at him, and the bone fell in the river. The dog said, "What a fool I have been," and walked away.

My grandfather told me I'm too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.

The kid was a bit sad, so he was blue.

Teacher asked him, "Why are you so blue?"

The kid replied, "I'm not sad."

Teacher said, "No, your face actually blue."

It's so sad that Stephen Hawking has a whole category on here about him and he can't stand up for himself.

How do you get an orphan's hands to bleed?

Tell him to clap until his parents come home!

Myla, what did you do for Father's Day?

Myla: I went to a restaurant.

Timmy, what did you do for Father's Day?

Timmy: I went to a concert.

Olivia, what did you do for Father's Day?

Olivia: Talked to him through an ouija board.

Why did my dad leave me and my mum?

I told him it wasn't big enough and then ran off saying, "Daddy, yeeeees!"

What do you and Joe Biden have in common?

Nobody loves you or him.

I cleaned my room today. While sweeping under the bed, I heard my mop collide with something. To my surprise, I found Pristiano Penaldo hiding under my bed! My dad said, “Don’t bother sweeping him son, he’s been dusted for years.” I was shocked but not surprised.

This mute kid was getting made fun of. I told him to speak up for himself.

My friend has a shovel made of gold. I guess you could call him a gold digger.

Please go subscribe to Kane Brown, people; he has good songs. Please go subscribe to him, please.

Where did your dad go? Because I saw him at the milk shop. Oh wait, there isn't one.