High

High Jokes

Ex-wife

My ex-wife was smoking pot with Snow White, when the 7 dwarfs saw them they sang...

"Look at those high Ho's! Hiiiiiiii Hoooooo'sssss!!!!"

  • 0
  • Moon

    I was born on the moon.

    Yeah, my mom was high, and my dad was down to earth.

    Priest

    A 23 year old priest walks into a high school with an automatic weapon. He tells those who believe in God to stand up and leave.

    To the children who don't leave, he says, "Do not worry my children, I shall make thou 'hole-y' as well."

    He then proceeds to shoot all of the students left.

  • 0
  • Cow

    A couple of cows were smoking a joint and playing cards...

    The steaks were pretty high.

    Marijuana

    Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke marijuana. Jack got high, pulled down his fly, and asked if she wanna. Jill said yes and pulled up her dress, and they had a little fun. Stupid Jill forgot the pill, now they have a son.

  • 7
  • Thot

    Roses are red, violets are not, everyone at Grant High School is probably a thot.

    Eyebrow

    I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.

    She looked at me surprised.

    (P.S. I am not at that age plus I am as straight as a helix ruler.)

    Plane

    What did one plane say to the other?

    "It’s been a long day, I’m ready to crash."

    Other plane: "No you’re not, we haven’t even gotten high yet!"

    Guy

    How can you tell if a gay guy has a high sperm count?

    Chew when you swallow!

    Football Game

    My first high-school football game was a lot like my first time having sex...

    I was bloody and sore at the end, but at least my dad came.

  • 3
  • Friend

    Friends are very important. I have lots of friends in very high places. I hope the police can talk them down!

    Teeth

    My brackets are so high on my teeth, they must be smoking something.

    Gambler

    A guy walks into a butcher's shop and says, "Sir, are you a gambling man?"

    The butcher says, "Why yes, as a matter of fact, I am."

    "Then I'll bet you $25 you can't reach up and touch that meat hanging over your head right there."

    The butcher thinks for a moment and says, "I'm sorry, I won't take that bet."

    The guy says, "But I thought you said you were a gambling man."

    "I am. But the steaks are too high."

    Teacher

    I'm a teacher at a high school, but I got fired. They told me I didn't do any work even though I always did a skele-ton.

    High-five

    People at my school have started to wear Logan Paul merch. I try to give them a high five, but they always leave me hanging.

    School

    All school meeting introductions:

    Grade School: “Welcome Girls and Boys!”

    Middle School: “Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome!”

    High School: “Fingerers and fingerees.”

    Roblox

    When a person is thinking of a high number in Roblox

    -smashes keyboard-