Hes jokes

Did you hear about the guy who drank invisible ink? He's at the hospital waiting to be seen.

My dad said, "Where's Pickles, the family cat?" I said, "I'm sorry to say he's in the sky." He said, "Oh, I see, he passed away." No, I strapped him to 20 fireworks!

My brother thinks he's cool when he just SMELLS.

What does Sonic say when he's bored?

Punch an orphan, what are they going to do, tell their parents?

Luke asks his friend, "How old is your father?"

James replied, "He's as old as me."

Luke then said, "It doesn't make any sense."

James then said, "He became my father when I was born."

Why was the PUBG player sad?

Since all his friends went to school while he went to Pochinki.

Why does Elmo turn emo? Because he's Elmo emo.

Stephen landed at Tilted and got 199 pumped, he's 1 shot!

What do you call a person with no arms and legs?

You can call him whatever you want; he's not coming.

What does the beet DJ say when he's partying?

"Dance to the beet, y'all!"

What is it called when an orphan goes on vacation?

Answer: He's making family memories.

I cleaned my room today. While sweeping under the bed, I heard my mop collide with something. To my surprise, I found Pristiano Penaldo hiding under my bed! My dad said, “Don’t bother sweeping him son, he’s been dusted for years.” I was shocked but not surprised.

What did a skeleton say when he's alone?

"I'm so bonely..."

What do you call a dog with no legs?

It doesn't matter, he's not coming.

Why can't the T-Rex cross the road?

Because he's extinct.

Teacher: We have a new student. He's an orphan.

Student: Oof.

Teacher: Is anyone missing?

Student: His parents.

Jim walks into a bar and asks for a shot of vodka. He then says to the barkeep, "Who's the toughest guy in here?"

The barkeep points to a man at the pool table. Jim then knocked him out and paid for the shot and left. He did this every Friday for 2 months. Finally, the barkeep is pissed because Jim keeps knocking out all of his customers. He then orders a gorilla and puts him in the bathroom.

Jim walks into the bar and gets another shot of vodka. He asks again, "Who's the toughest guy in here tonight?" The bartender points to the bathroom and says he's in there. Jim walks into the bathroom and everyone in the bar can hear yelling and screaming. The bartender asks, "What happened in there?" Jim smiles and says, "I don't know who that was, but when he wakes up tell him I put his fur jacket in the toilet."

Why do you need an AR-15?

So my son can use it if he's being bullied at school.

When the police caught him stealing batteries, he was immediately charged.

The cops are accusing him of resisting. He's now languishing in a cell, where he is currently awaiting an appearance in Circuit Court.

Is she saying, "Watch for red flags because he's toxic," or is he socialist?