Yo momma so fat she died at 5. Her kids, f
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Herring Jokes
My friend is so ugly, she got surgery twice, but not even that could fix her.
Yo mama's so fat, she thinks the buffet is the starter plate.
Was busy robbing a house as quietly as possible and saw a woman catching me in the act, decided to get her in on the act and gave away my location from the noise.
Every time my grandmother and I were at a wedding, she’d say: “you’re next.” So I started saying the same thing to her at funerals.
My mom ate my food, so I ate her pet hamster.
I went on a date with an Eastern European chick. She got mad because I rushed her...
Get it? It's Russia, and I rushed her.
Your momma's so fat, when I went to suck her tit, I got a mouthful of knee.
Your mom is just like Rapunzel, but instead of letting down her hair, she lets everyone down! OHHHHH!
A man sees a girl crying and asks her what's wrong.
The girl replied, "Everyone keeps making fun of me."
"You should tell your parents," I replied back.
The girl started crying even more. That's when I got confused and left the orphanage.
Your mom is so ugly that even Medusa turned to stone from looking at her!
Yo mamma so dumb, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.
It was my cousin's birthday and my mom said what should we get her? I said a rope.
I scanned an emo girl's arm the other day. Now I own her, only 3.99 with tax. That's a steal and a half, woopeeee!
Your dad left you because he went for milk.
*1,000,000 years later*
Her: Dad come back!
Him: FBI open up!
One day, someone's ex was going to the kitchen to get something to eat, and her ex-boyfriend was there and gave her an apple. Next minute, she had chlamydia. What did the boyfriend do?
Yo mama is so ugly, when I took a picture of her, my phone screen cracked.
What is the worst thing that Nazis have done?
Adolf Hit-her.
Why did the Mexican man push his wife off a cliff?
Tequila.
Yo mama is so pretty, she could get in a car crash because boys are staring at her.
