Her jokes

My little sister that is 10 is so ugly her hairline can't even be found by Dora the Explorer.

I caught my wife this morning gazing at our marriage license of long ago that hangs upon our wall with tears in her eye!

Almost got teary eyed myself until she told me she was only looking for the expiration date!

Yo mama so dumb, when the doctor told her she had coronavirus, she bought a new laptop.

A woman once didn't return home for the night, and the next morning when she arrived home, her husband started questioning her about where she had been. She lied, saying she slept at one of her friends' houses.

The man proceeded to call all her friends, all of whom denied her sleeping at their places the previous night.

Meanwhile, somewhere else, a man didn't return home to his wife for the night either. The following morning, his wife started questioning him, and he lied, saying he slept at a friend's house. She proceeded to call all his friends. All of them said that he indeed slept at their places the previous night, and one of them even insisted that he's still there, but he's using the bathroom and he can't talk right now!

A girl walks up to her blind friend who she had not seen in a while and says: "Long time no see!"

So I punched an orphan...

What's he/she going to do? Tell his/her parents???

So I suggested to my wife that she'd look sexier with her hair back...

Which is apparently an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient.

Yo mama is so fat that she crushed her PlayStation profile.

There is a joke that did not enter this page... Why? She is afraid they will laugh at her!

How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her? She found another woman's lipstick on his knuckles.

Ya nan does gymnastics with her boyfriends.

Some kid in a wheelchair called me fat.

I told her, "Do a wheelie!"

So a lady came up to me today at the bank, and she asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

My girlfriend broke up with me, so I stole her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back!

Yo momma so fat, I took a photo of her last year and it's still printing.

What do a 14-year-old pregnant girl and the child inside her have in common?

Both are thinking, “Oh no! My mom’s gonna kill me!”

It was raining sadly all day. My wife, my two daughters, and me were stuck in the house when wife’s mom and dad just died.

Wife: 😭😭😭I wish this never happened.

Mia, our first daughter: Mommy, it’s ok. I love whenever I see you🥰🥰

Abby, our second daughter: I love you all. Only if you guys die I won’t, but I love you when you're alive 😉😏

Me, husband: What kind of nonsense was that? You love us when we’re alive, but you don’t love us when we’re dead🤥😥😓

Everyone except Abby: Abby, this is serious. Mommy’s mother and father died. Mia says: Yes, your mom is sadly down right now, you made her more sad😡🤬. Dad says: *sniffs* Abby, I had made a discussion. I will take you to an orphanage. I am sorry 😣 when I am better and happy and I forgot what you said then we’ll get you back. Mom says:

This was not a joke. I just did this for Love 💕

My last relationship ended because I didn’t open the car door for her. Instead, I just went to the top of the water.

Yo mama so fat, when she falls, they have to call 999 and a crane to pick her up.

Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing!