Hearing jokes

Did you hear about the deaf guy's STI?

He got hearing aids.

"Jesus loves you" is a wonderful thing to hear in church.

But a horrible thing to hear in a Mexican prison.

What made Adam and Eve's marriage perfect?

He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn't have to hear about his Mom's cooking.

The fact I couldn't hear the announcements at my school because the boys in my advisory are clapping with no hands should be a joke just in itself. They were making sexual faces as well, oh, and don't forget the moaning they do.

When I bring someone breakfast in bed, I want to hear a thank you. And no, “What are you doing in my house?”

You know you have weird Indian parents when you can hear them canilingus each other.

Did you hear? There's a new fast food restaurant coming: Jacko in the Box.

I keep hearing "Obesity kills."

My only question is "Why is it taking so long?"

Did you hear about the streaker in church? He was caught by the organ.

Did you hear what happened to Lorainna Bobbit? She was in an accident on the Garden State Parkway. She told the State Police Officer, "That some dick cut her off."

Wanna hear a couple of short jokes and a long joke?

Joke,

Joke,

Jooooooooooooooke.

Did you hear that song about 9/11? It was a real banger!

Did you hear about the cello player who dreamed he was performing Bolero?

He woke up and found out it was true.

Did you hear about the blonde who walked into a bar?......... It hurt.

Wanna hear a construction joke?

Nah, I'm still working on it.

Wanna hear a joke?

Yeah.

...

What's the joke?

I said it already!

Did you hear about the delivery boy that worked for that Italian Restaurant down the street?

Yeah, he Pasta-Way.

"I hear you asking, 'What's your favorite instrument?' The Trombone."

What do you call a deaf dog? As you like, he doesn't hear you anyway.

When a deaf person is on trial, is it really considered a hearing?