1 like=1 more missile aimed at a hospital
You’re forehead so big when you were being born the doctors thought you had no face
why cant orphans go to the hospital? because it is a family hospital ( sorry for the long breack in between my jokes i just had some family stuff but i am back
What do priest and doctors have in common?
They both do physicals on kids.
When you turn off all the annoying beeping things in the hospital and everyone starts sleeping better.
Doctor: Do you want the good news or the bad news first? Patient: Good news! Doctor: We are naming a disease after you.
Doctor: you'll be at peace soon, sir. Me: what am I dying? Doctor: no your wife is.
So I was f*****g this b***h right, and I thought I had aides. So I go and get tested. Turns out I did get aides. Now what I'm wondering is where the hell does an eight year old get aides?! I guess my sister needs new friends...
A woman walks into a doctor's office. She schedules an appointment and sits down it the waiting room. Whem it's her turn to talk to the doctor, she describes all of her symptoms, and they're unlike anything he's heard before. The doctor runs a few tests and steps out of the room. He comes back later, and says, 'Well I have good news and bad news.' The woman says, 'I'll hear the good news first please.' The doctor replies 'The good news is we're naming a disease after you!'
I got kicked out of the hospital.
Apparently, the sign "Stroke patients here" meant something totally different.
doctors in the middle ages, Plague doctor: "i must have some herbs to block out bad air" docters now: "God, wtf were we doing back then"
Why is there AC in hospitals? To keep all the vegetables fresh.
Woman: Doctor doctor I've been raped.
Doctor: Sex is good for you
my grandma unplugged the internet cable so i unplugged her life support
A common question I get as a doctor is, do vaccines cause autism? Well!, I was vaccinated, so.....
*in the hospital* paralyzed kid : I'm out *walks out the room* blind kid : you can walk?! mute kid : you can see?! deaf kid : you can talk?! doctor : wut the f(beep)k
Why can't people in africa have medicine?
Because you cannot have pills on an empty stomach
Did you hear about the guys hole left side got cut off! But he’s all right now
What did grandpa say before he died in the hospital bed?
"boy, could you put my phone on charging?"
How do you recover from prostate cancer surgery?
It’s all Depends!
