Kid: I have the corona virus
Nurse: here is an ice pack
Why are hospitals always freezing?
They need to keep the vegetables cold.
Man Cancer is so easy to beat, I'm already on stage 4
My mom asked my doctor, "Why is my unvaccinated baby crying?" The doctor replied, "He's going through a Mid-life Crisis
Technoblade: makes jokes about orphans while in hospital
Doctors to Technoblade's dad: Sorry for your loss
Technoblade: What do you mean?? I'm right here!!
Orphans found parents: Who's he talking to??
Why can't Oregon go to the doctor
Because parents signature
I got evicted from the hospital today For telling all the patients to stay positive! What a negative effect!
Welcome to joes abortion clinic no fetus can beat us! You make em we take em!
What do doctors say to patients who blow wind backwards? DON'T PUT THE FART BEFORE THE FORCE!!
As a doctor myself, there nurse was very slow, she tested my patience!
Donald Trump is making hospitals so poor that they are using kidney beans for their transplants
Q. What do rape victims miss?
A. Part of their brain
How does a lady with stage 3 cancer introduce herself ....... hey y'all I'm Diane
Why doesn't Africa have pharmacies? Because you can't take drugs on an empty stomach.
Healthcare these days is a bit of an Obamanation.
He died because of a fuck up by the Hospital, apparently the doctor said to the nurse you can discharge Mr Hawking now, so she went to his room and pulled the plug out of his computer.
what's better than having unprotected sex? getting an abortion.
Where’s the best place to spawn camp at the hospital? The maternity ward.
So a woman gives birth to a child and the doctor grabs it by the leg and holds it upside down and starts swinging it around the room and slamming it into the furniture. The mother tries to get up and starts screaming and crying, “Let my baby go you sick bastard!”, and the doctor looks at the mother and stops swinging the baby. He is holding it by the left leg and starts chuckling, “I’m just kidding, it was already dead.”
So i was sitting with my little brother and talk about our dreams. "What do you wanna be when you grow up?" I asked him. He answered "A doctor!". I wanted to tease him so i said "I wouldn't be treated by a doctor like you". I was hoping he would get mad or something but instead, he calmly replied "Brother, i said doctor. Not a vet"
