Head jokes
"Why is my name Rose?"
"A rose fell on your head when you were born."
"Why is my name Daisy?"
"A daisy fell on your head when you were born."
"Bedrock is better than Java!"
"Oh, hi Brick!"
A blind man walks into a bar and starts to swing his guide dog around his head. The bartender asks him nervously, "Are you okay?" The blind man replies, "Yeah, I’m just looking around!"
What do you call someone that looks like Stephen Hawkins and is a space head? Byron Davey.
Knock knock!!
Who's there??
Dishwasher!!
Dishwasher who??
Dishwasher way i used to talk when i got my head kicked in!
My name is Gunter.
Gunter Gunter is dead.
Gunter Gunter stuffed my cat's head. ;D
Hi guys! Ello here! So I am determined to get as many people as possible to like my jokes and comment. So, without further ado, here goes nothing!
So I have been looking at all your jokes, and UHHHHHH has not been the nicest. I don't really love the words she is choosing, but I'm not going to let her get in my head. :)
So guys make sure that you like and comment! Love y'all!!!!! :D
You're so bald, the reflection off your head is blinding people in India.
You: Its nighttime, shouldn't we be heading to bed?
Boy Roommate: Ok, are you Top or Bottom?
You: Uhhhhhhh
Boy Roommate: No dumby, bunk beds.
You: Thank God.
Boy Roommate: But if you wanna, we can...
You: *faints*
Jackie gives better head than Marilyn.
There were 500 bricks on a plane. One fell off.
Little Sally was crossing a river full of crocodiles. How did she survive the river? She had a gun. When she got out of the river, she died. Why? Because a brick fell on her head.
5 Little Monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said... "Wait, why are there mines all over the floor?"
What’s better than swinging a dead baby in circles over your head with a 5 foot rope?
Stopping it with a shovel.
Two guys were on a hunting trip, and after the first day of hunting, they didn’t see anything, so they decided the next day they would split up and meet back at the fire at dinner time.
After a day of hunting, they meet back at the fire, and one hunter asked the other, “How did your day go?”
The one hunter said, “I had the best day ever! I went down the hill and hunted by the train tracks and saw the hottest chick ever. We had sex for hours in every position you could think of.”
Then the other hunter asked him, “Was she a good lookin’ blond?” And he said, “Oh, I don’t know, I didn’t find her head.”
The thing about 9/11 and the jokes about it, for most people it flew over their head, for some it flew into their head.
If Sakura's head looks like earth, then her hairline has to look like the Milky Way.
A sister went to her brother's room and says,
"I'm scared, can I sleep with you?"
"Yes, sis."
"What is this?" (pointing at his dick)
"My pet snake."
"Can I pet it?"
"Yes."
He wakes up in a hospital.
"What happened?"
"Your snake spit on me, so I bit his head off."
"You dummy!"
"Whaaat?"
What did the chicken say when he saw a human running around uncontrollably?
"It's running around like a chicken with its head cut off!"
What did the human say to the fly when it was buzzing around the human's head?
"Would you stop bugging me!"
You have a head of a Malteser and a hairline VEGTA.
Are your forehead and your hairline best friends because they look like they go way back?