Have jokes
What's the best part of being a pedophile? You will never have a wife.
Have you ever been eight before?
You were between 7 and 9.
You know chords, right? Well, you know what I love to do? To play with A-minor. You know, feel your fingers on A-minor. Gives you a sense of power, to just F A-minor.
But that's not my favorite thing to fiddle with. That would be the D of minors. It's just solid, you know. If you're clever you can have the D of minors into the C of minors. Or, though a bit tricky, the D of minors into the B of minors.
And at this point you've gotten the point and if I want to continue it would be a bit of a stretch.
You can easily outrun a midget because they have to run twice as much as you do.
Old man goes to the doctor.
The doctor says, "The test results are back, and I'm sad to say you have cancer and Alzheimer's."
The old man says, "Phew! At least it's not cancer!"
People with Down syndrome have a specific skill only they have; they can give a blow job and talk to you while sounding exactly the same.
They have a new line of socks for paraplegics.
They are so comfortable they can't even feel them.
This one time I said to a person that they are dry, then I was wet (ba dum tiss).
My bully said I have to shut up. I said, "Shut down" (ba dum tiss).
We asked our teacher many times for an atlas, and he said, "At last, you can have one!"
What is the reason for why women never look to the right?
Because they don't have any rights.
What do ambulances and gay men have in common? They both take it in the back and go whoop whoop! :D
A girl said, "Suck my dick," and the man went, "I have boobs."
How is spinach like anal sex?
If you were forced to have it as a child, you probably won't like it as an adult.
How do u know Stephen Hawking is having a seizure?
He spills coffee on his iPad.
I have 3 eyes, 2 ears, and 6 mouths, what am I?
UGLY!
Yo mama got a daughter in a relationship, and I don't have time for you, ASAP, daughter, daughter, or your mother, or your call, or your choice of choice.
Why don't skeletons fight each other?
They don't have the guts.
Why can't skeletons play church music?
Because they have no organs.
A 13 year old girl is having a sleepover. One of her friends asks, "When was the last time you had an orgasm?" She replies, "3 days ago." Dad comes bursting in, "I KNEW YOU WERE FAKING LAST NIGHT!"
What do McDonald's and a priest have in common? They both put their meat in 10 year old buns.