Harding jokes
What animal howls at the moon and eats cement?
If you guessed wolf, you're right! I threw in the cement to make it hard.
A man is about to be hanged. His executioner asks for his last words.
The man says, “Man, it’s hard to think of something when your life is on the line.”
I broke my ankles so hard I had to walk uphill both ways.
Peanuts are hard to crack, just like my ex-wife's heart.
Which one's super super corny?
1. What's blue and not heavy? (🤔) Light blue.
2. What's blue and super hard to see?
Dark blue. (🤔)
What motorway lane does Stephen Hawking use?
Hard shoulder.
Why was the computer late to work?
Because it had a hard drive!
What’s long and hard and full of semen?
A submarine.
Obama has dih.
But the Twin Towers just had a hard landing.
How many Tottenham players does it take to win a trophy? It doesn't matter how hard they try, they still can't win one anyway.
What do math and me on P-hub have in common?
They are both hard.
No matter how hard I try, I will never be a stand-up comedian.
What does Stephen Hawking press after he's had a hard day?
F5
I made this up.
I was watching a school baseball game, and I was yelling at a kid to take it home. He took the bat and threw it, and then ran away. I asked the teacher/coach what the problem was, and he said the kid was an orphan, and I started laughing so hard.
Later that night, I wondered where he stormed off to after he threw the bat, and I thought to myself, "Not home."
Rachel won the lottery twice in two years. Her friend Jim called her every day asking for tips on winning, just the same. Then one day, simply to get rid of him, Rachel said, "Watch two martial arts movies, eat three pieces of hard beef jerky, and pick a fight at a bar."
Jim replied with a shocked look, "That's what I do after Mr. Tugman shakes my hand too long."
Do you think you can solve a riddle about my penis because I don't think you can...
It's too hard.
How long does it take for 10 dead babies to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.
What’s Elon Musk Jr.'s favorite food?
WD 5TB My Passport Portable External Hard Drive HDD, USB 2.0 Compatible, Black - WDBPKJ0050BBK-WESN
What do you call a dwarf that fell into a cement mixer?
A wee hard man.
Hey guys, I just wanna say what happened to Kanye; he is one of my favorite rappers, and he’s going through a hard time. I don’t see why people can’t just spread love and kindness like me💕
I think that Kanye was right to say what he said. I completely support him, and I don’t understand why people hate on him for using his 1st amendment, and Yeezy should be sued for it.
Quote of the day: Love bests hate as for hate is the killer of friendships - Collin Kaepernick