“Mom these balloons are hard to blow.”
“Son stay out of the drawer.”
Have you learn SoDN in chemistry? It's so hard
What's SoDN?
Suck On deez nuts
How to protect your nuts from being hit: Just get hard
I hope you have to pull hard on a candy wrapper only for the bag to pop and have the candy fall on the floor
What is long, hard, and has cum in it?
A cucumber.
hey a woah man, and ALYA how r u guys? oh and hbu jk master? how is life rn is it hard? u wanna tal?
It's hard to tell if people are interested in joining my Sarcastic Club or not.
Tired kid with asthma: it's hard to breathe. Gym Teacher: That's alright. Other Kid: Hush.
Spread my legs like butter n finger me hard👅👅👅
WATERSHARKY DISS TRACK - by Firesharky
You smell like you farted FARTED harded HARDED A B Honor Roll. all Fs you r*tarded. OHHHH
Yo mama so stupid she brought weed to the high way, Then sh realized im not stupid i was just high as a bitch she just got fucked so hard by her man she thought she was high.
my dick hard
who make hard candy for the kids
solve
One time I was at home alone with my dawgy and I was home alone with my dawgy, and, and I was eating peanut butter, and I thought since its oily, I could use it as a lotion, so I spread it all over my private part, and my dawgy came over and started licking the peanut butter up off my private part, and my private part, it got big and hard, and then peanut butter, but white came out of my wee wee, and my dawgy started looking up at me and whining. And then my daddy came home and saw what I was doing and shouted “What are you doing?” And then I said I was using peanut butter on my private part. Then he said, “Well let me have a taste.” And then he started doing what my dawgy was doing.
A cop saw an old lady carring two sacks. He asked the lady what she was doing. She opened one bag and shows a bunch of cash. "How did you get all this?" asked the cop. "Well, I live behind a golf course, and my backyard has many holes in its fence. Since there are no bathrooms nearby, the golfers stick their dicks through the holes and piss onto my hard, and that keeps killing my flowers. So, I grapped by hedge clippers, and when they stick it through, I grab their dick and yell, '10 bucks right now or it comes clean off!' After that nobody pees in my yard ever again." The cop responded with, "Dang. But what about the other bag?" She said, "Not everybody paid."
When I die, I want my body to be cremated. And fucked! Fucked really hard, papí!! Like a real whore!! Like a real tramp!! Stuff your entire cock in there!!! Uhh!! Uhh!!
Whats hot and hard? Me when i look at children
What kind of tea is hard to swallow??
Reality.
My diet consists of Blood Pudding, I love it and have it for breakfast, lunch and dinner, my secret ingredient though?
It consists of the blood and insides of my victims, it’s a bit chunky sometimes, some bits chewy, some bits hard
But it’s a hearty meal
Three sons left home, went out into the world and each of them made a lot of money. During a reunion, they discussed the gifts they'd given to their elderly mum.
'I built a big house for our mum,' said the first.
'I sent her a Mercedes, with a chauffeur,' said the second.
And the third smiled and said, 'I think my gift was the best. You know how much mum enjoyed reading the Bible? And you know that her eyes aren't so good anymore? Well, I sent her a remarkable cockatoo that recites the entire Bible, both old and new testaments. It took a priest twelve years to teach him. That cockatoo is the only one in the world that can do it. All mum has to do is name the chapter and verse, and the cockatoo recites it.'
A few days later, mum sent out her thankyou letters. She wrote to the first son,
'The house you built is so enormous that I only live in one room. The trouble is, I have to clean the whole house.'
To the second son she said, 'I'm far too old to travel anymore. I stay at home most of the time, so I've hardly used the Mercedes. In any case, the driver is so rude.'
To the third son she wrote 'Dearest Freddie. You have the good sense to know what your mum likes. The chicken was delicious!'
