What animal howls at the moon and eats cement?
If you guessed wolf, you're right! I threw in the cement to make it hard.
Harding Jokes
I broke my ankles so hard I had to walk uphill both ways.
"I miss you.
Being happy was never that hard without you..."
Someone's dad: You think he/she wants to join me? I didn't get the milk...
Did you know penguins can fly if you throw them hard enough? Just like children!
Life is never hard until you get hit hard with reality.
Nostalgia hits you like a train.
It's so hard, you can even wake up.
I laughed at my life so hard.
What type of tea is hard to swallow?
Reality.
Which one's super super corny?
1. What's blue and not heavy? (🤔) Light blue.
2. What's blue and super hard to see?
Dark blue. (🤔)
Peanuts are hard to crack, just like my ex-wife's heart.
What motorway lane does Stephen Hawking use?
Hard shoulder.
I told my sister that when you go to bed with an itchy butt, you're going to have smelly fingers in the morning, and I've never heard her laugh so hard in my life.
Why was the computer late to work?
Because it had a hard drive!
What do math and me on P-hub have in common?
They are both hard.
No matter how hard I try, I will never be a stand-up comedian.
What does Stephen Hawking press after he's had a hard day?
F5
I made this up.
I was watching a school baseball game, and I was yelling at a kid to take it home. He took the bat and threw it, and then ran away. I asked the teacher/coach what the problem was, and he said the kid was an orphan, and I started laughing so hard.
Later that night, I wondered where he stormed off to after he threw the bat, and I thought to myself, "Not home."
Rachel won the lottery twice in two years. Her friend Jim called her every day asking for tips on winning, just the same. Then one day, simply to get rid of him, Rachel said, "Watch two martial arts movies, eat three pieces of hard beef jerky, and pick a fight at a bar."
Jim replied with a shocked look, "That's what I do after Mr. Tugman shakes my hand too long."
Do you think you can solve a riddle about my penis because I don't think you can...
It's too hard.
How long does it take for 10 dead babies to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.
