HA jokes
In America, 1 in 10 houses has a paedophile.
Not me, I live next to a smoking hot 8-year-old.
When your girlfriend has an abortion, it's kinda like dodging your own bullets.
What's the difference between Batman and a gay person?
Batman has no one to call "daddy."
I was about to go to sleep, but then I remembered my idol has 0 G/A, and it's mid-November. Thanks, Pessi, for ruining my sleep! π€¬
Why can't an orphan have an iPhone?
It has a home button.
Mom: You will make me kill myself.
Me who has cut first: I'll kill myself β¨firstβ¨!
Why can't the skeleton go to the dance?
Because he has "no body" to go with!
What's worse than depression & suicide?
Easy: LIVING. Everyday you wish you were dead but then reality hits you in the face that you're still alive and have to suffer living.
Pretend or not pretend, we have to decide everyday even if we don't pretend no one will notice :) no one ever does :). Living is the problem to everything. We get depression cuz of it and so much. Why can't we just die :)?
Dwayne βthe Rockβ Johnson has made a laudable, command decision to omit real firearms from his movie sets.
This being the case, he ought to produce, direct, and star in his next movie titled: βThe Rubber Gun Squad!β π π
If Sakura's head looks like earth, then her hairline has to look like the Milky Way.
*Breaking News!* - Apparently the first person in Melbourne has died because of the Coronavirus. In his house they found 1000 cans of food, 50 kilos of pasta, 80 kilos of rice, 300 toilet rolls and 50L of hand sanitiser which he had panic purchased from the supermarket and stockpiled "just in case".
The whole lot collapsed and buried him.
It's so sad that Stephen Hawking has a whole category on here about him and he can't stand up for himself.
Person 1: Yassin has sex with a piece of sex.
Person 2: Nice, can I have some of your balls?
What type of cookie has an orphan never had? Homemade cookies.
Yo forehead so large, it has its own gravitational pull.
When an orphan is playing baseball, how come the coach doesn't tell them to hit it home?
He has no home to hit to.
What has four legs and one arm? A Doderman in a playground.
What type of cookie has an orphan never had? Home made cookies ;)
What is long, hard, and has cum in it?
A cucumber.
One day a couple was walking when the man stepped on something hard and squishy, then they heard a sound from the bushes. Instead of looking down, they both ran.
Two years later, they turned on the TV to find Ted Bundy on trial. They asked him if he has ever been caught. He said, "No, but a couple was walking as soon as I killed a girl. I jumped into a bush. They didn't know I was there, but the man stepped on the dead body but didn't look down, then he and his girlfriend ran."