Why did the bank robber shoot the man with no arms?
Because he told the man to put his hands up.
your mom
Drop me in Afghanistan with a Dodge Challenger Super Stock, a Mexican named Jose, a 6 pack of Dr. Pepper, a golden SCAR, a pack of chimichangas, and an M4A1, and I'll have the Taliban saying the Pledge of Allegiance in 4 hours.
What are the best shooting ranges in America?
Schools.
When the school shooter breaks into your classroom, so you try to say goodbye to your Roblox gf, but then the shooter's phone goes off.
You want to know the bad thing? Only 5 out of 6 people like Russian roulette.
I don't understand why, when I went to the shooting range today, the police came. Like, bro, I always go to elementary schools.
What do you do during a shooting? Why, join in, of course...
What's a school shooter's favorite flower?
Columbine.
My name is Dan, I wear white Vans, I have a gun, get in the van!
I swear, in America, one school shooter can take good care of hundreds of kids, but hundreds of soldiers can't even win a war. Might as well send all your school shooters over there.
A man walks into a bar with a 44. Magnum and yells, "Who the fuck fucked my wife?" The bartender answers, "Mate, you ain't got enough bullets."
What did the white kid pull out of his bookbag?
A 9mm.
What do Phillip Adam and Kurt Cobain have in common?
They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.
Teacher: "I'm sorry, but you got a 74 on the test."
Quiet Kid: "I'll show you my own 74."
Classroom: *visible panic*
What's so special about bullets?
They do work after they are fired.
When the quiet kid has an argument with the school shooter, and you didn't get to pull out the AK.
Are you a bullet? Because I can't get you out of my head.
If a school shooter walks into a classroom and shoots an autistic kid, what does the kid say? "Why do I look like Swiss cheese?"
What do a mag and a clip have in common? They are both good at school.
