Gun jokes
A depressed man buys a gun for suicide, but then thinks, "maybe I shouldn't be doing this," and asks a friend for help. He returns with a rope.
Why did the bank robber shoot the man with no arms?
Because he told the man to put his hands up.
your mom
What do Phillip Adam and Kurt Cobain have in common?
They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.
Drop me in Afghanistan with a Dodge Challenger Super Stock, a Mexican named Jose, a 6 pack of Dr. Pepper, a golden SCAR, a pack of chimichangas, and an M4A1, and I'll have the Taliban saying the Pledge of Allegiance in 4 hours.
Memes
What are the best shooting ranges in America?
Schools.
What's a school shooter's favorite flower?
Columbine.
When the school shooter breaks into your classroom, so you try to say goodbye to your Roblox gf, but then the shooter's phone goes off.
Teacher: "I'm sorry, but you got a 74 on the test."
Quiet Kid: "I'll show you my own 74."
Classroom: *visible panic*
What's so special about bullets?
They do work after they are fired.
When the quiet kid has an argument with the school shooter, and you didn't get to pull out the AK.
You want to know the bad thing? Only 5 out of 6 people like Russian roulette.
What do you do during a shooting? Why, join in, of course...
I don't understand why, when I went to the shooting range today, the police came. Like, bro, I always go to elementary schools.
My dad just found out and told my mom about one of their friends, Chad, who just murdered his wife, Claire. After doing that, he turned the gun on himself and committed suicide right after.
My mom's reply: "Jesus, Chad will do anything to get out of cleaning his mess, won't he?"
Kurt Cobain didn't mean to kill himself. He was just so high he thought the shotgun was a bong.
His lyrics are so ironic but so true. "I'm not coming back". "I swear I don't have a gun."
My name is Dan, I wear white Vans, I have a gun, get in the van!
I swear, in America, one school shooter can take good care of hundreds of kids, but hundreds of soldiers can't even win a war. Might as well send all your school shooters over there.
A man walks into a bar with a 44. Magnum and yells, "Who the fuck fucked my wife?" The bartender answers, "Mate, you ain't got enough bullets."
What did the white kid pull out of his bookbag?
A 9mm.