Government jokes
What do you call the longest reigning monarch?
The queen? No, she dead.
Why do they call it America when literally nothing is free?
Why is Donald Duck the president? Because Donald Trump has a duck.
If the red house is on the left, and the blue house on the right, where is the white house?
In Washington D.C.
What do you call a country with nukes?
Abomination.
How do you get your appeal for rape charges accepted? Say you were expressing your desire for a woman, which is protected under the Constitution in freedom of expression.
What's the difference between a prostitute and a Democrat? A Democrat will keep screwing you when you run out of money.
He only won the election because of rigging.
82 million votes my ass.
Ask me for proof.
ICE and ISIS have similar first syllables. Coincidence? I think not!
What's Trump's favorite instrument?
A TRUMPet!!!
Somebody told me to go to hell, so I walked up to Donald Trump.
"Welcome to the gulag."
It's past April Fool's Day, and we still have a joke as president.
What makes laissez-faire and a gangbang the same?
Not my problem.
Reviews for the Chinese flag are in!
5 stars!
Q: How do you know when Putin is lying?
A: His lips move.
Q: How do you know when someone is an opposition leader to Putin?
A: When they are falling from their balcony.
JFK tried meditating. He told everyone he is very open-minded.
I'm gonna blow out your lungs faster than Joe Biden thinks is possible with a 9mm.
When does a Pentagon have 4 sides? When it's intercepted by a plane.