Go jokes

Hello, everybody, it's me, Mariplier, and today I'm going to be balling at Freddy's!

Angela: Kris, I just met the nicest, sweetest guy ever.

Kristie: Who is he and what is his name?

Angela: His name is Kevin.

Kristie: Kevin? I remember him. He said he had to go to Italy for a meeting, never seen him after that. What the hell is Kevin doing here?

Angela: I don't know.

In the hospital, I saw a girl with cancer trying to sleep. The ICU was going beep beep beep. I think that's why she can't sleep, so I turned it off. She's asleep forever now. Nighty night.

What's the difference between a seal and a special kid?

They both go: "Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh!"

How do you ground a Gen Z?

Make them go outside and socialize.

When does the slowest person go as fast as a train?

When he is on the train.

Imagine going up to an emo and saying, "You're just like a spider, you're both good at hanging."

Friend: Your t-shirt is cringe.

Me: You should go get the Covid test because one of their symptoms is no taste.

There was this boy. He had diarrhea, and he kept asking to go to the bathroom, but the teacher said no. Next thing you know, he pooped himself in front of the class.

What takes 10 seconds to go SLPAT! on the ground?

9/11 victim!

I spent 10 hours applying makeup so I could look pretty when I was going to have sex with my partner.

I needn't have bothered.

The next day, it was smeared all over my face.

What does a deaf person and an orphan have in common? They both can’t hear their parents.

Why can’t an orphan go to Family Dollar? They don’t have a family.

Don’t mess with an emo because if their friends pull up, you gotta fight the suicide squad.

Q: Why can’t Stephen Hawking go to the countryside?

A: There’s no signal.

You're so small that when you go to the doctor, he doesn’t know you're there.

I really wasn't planning on going for a run today, but damn, those cops came out of nowhere!

10 years ago my dad went to get milk. He said when he got back, he was going to tell me a joke. That joke better be worth it!

Who comes when an orphan gets married? They are allowed back in family restaurants, but when I go in alone, I'm not allowed. I have some parents, for God's sake!

I decided today that I was going to do something with my life, something amazing, and I decided to punch a homeless man.

Kobe couldn’t clutch up with the rift to go.

Spend all night in a dark humor webpage.

Go to an orphanage today and read it to them.

And I'm sure if you go to a school for disabled children, they should understand it.