Hotness jokes
I like my women how I like my coffee... HOT.
omg hot.
A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."
Why was it so hot in a square room? Because all the corners are 90 degrees.
Two homeless alcoholics want to get drunk but don't have enough money for even the cheapest drinks in any bar. So one of them devises a clever plan: he tells his friend, "We should buy a hot-dog sausage with the last of our money and stick it down my pants, then drink a load of drinks. But then when the bill comes, you get down and suck on the hot-dog, and it'll look like you're sucking on my dick. So then we'll get thrown out without paying, and we can just go to another bar and do the same thing again."
His friend agrees, so they buy the hot-dog, stick it down the first dude's pants, go to the bar, and then the second dude begins to suck on the hot-dog as agreed. They are thrown out and hit another four bars this way. In the end, as they lie drunk on the floor in some alleyway, the second guy says, "Well, what a great night. Free beers in five different bars!" The first guy says, "Yeah! Especially since the hot-dog fell out before we even reached the first bar!"
My bf: Knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
My bf: Ice cream.
Me: Ice cream who?
My bf: I scream if you don't let me see that smoking hot body!
Why are most firefighters men? Because they like to find hot places and leave them wet.
Dino nuggets are kinda hot. Also, I want to fuck the brown M&M.
Hot water look a**.
If your hot dog tastes like a piece of wood, who are you going to call?
"Ghost Musterd."
Homie: Let's meet.
Skrr: It's 🔥🌭
Meaning: It's hot [🔥] dawg [🌭]!
I lent a hot girl my umbrella yesterday. That takes the number of girls I've made wet this year to -1.
What did the dirt say to the embers?
You look smoking hot.
What do you call an orphan in a wheelchair running into fire? Hot Wheels.
What do you call hot cups?
Sunglasses.
What’s the difference between a hot potato and a flying pig?
One’s a heated yam, and the other’s a YEATED HAM!
"This dude right here don't look nothing like no damn Tyrese Gibson. He look like a hot, fishy tail termite all dressed in green makeup."
You're so hot!
North Korea and the Martians were fighting about who was going to reach Venus first.
Trump steps in and says, "That doesn't matter, America is going to land on the sun first."
The Martians and North Korea said, "You can't land on the sun, it's too hot and you will die."
Trump said his brilliant plan, "America is going to land there at night."
Why was the obtuse angle hot?
It was more than 90 degrees.