A little girl and a little boy are taking a bath together when the little girl looks down and asks, “Whats that?” the little boy says, “That’s my little red race car.” 10 minutes later the boy looks down and asks, “Whats that?” the little girl says, "that’s my little red race car garage.” So later that night the little boy asks the little girl if he can put his little red race car in her little red race car garage, She said yes and then they pull down their pants and the boy tries putting his little red race car in her garage but it won’t fit. Down stairs the mother hears an ear piercing scream and runs up the stairs, flips on the lights and sees blood on the floor, the mother asks "What happened?” the little girl says, “We tried putting his car in my garage and it wouldn’t fit so i cut the back wheels off.”

How do you get a fat girl to bed? Piece of cake

I used to date a girl named Ruth but she broke up with me and now I am ruthless.

Once upon a time, there was a magician named Daniel. He usually did gigs for children and this time he was working at a kid’s birthday party. He walked in and said “Hi boys and girls, my name is Daniel.” He performed multiple tricks, each one amazing the children. Then, he said “And for my final trick; I will disappear!” He lifted up a blanket and when it fell down he was gone. Then, the birthday boy said “Hey, he’s like my dad.” “Really” asked a little girl? “I guessed?” he said back, “My dad wasn’t a magician, but he disappeared. I haven’t seen him since…”

What’s the worst part of Breaking up with a Japanese girl?

You have to drop the bomb twice until she finally gets it.

Charizarding When you light a girls pubes on fire, put it out with your jizz then flap your arms and say “You don’t have have enough badges to train me”

So a girl says to her ex I can’t get you out of my mind the boyfriend I knew you we’ve the girl replies I see you in everything like when I’m walking down the street even at work like trash cans are everywhere

My sister’s bf is mad at me cuz I fucked his girl

Girl 1: Dad, why is my name rose? Dad: because a rose landed on your head. Girl 2: Hey dad, why is my name daisy? Dad: because a daisy landed on your head. Boy: Hitddvjkyrefbhhhrurrrr! Dad: Oh, Hey Brick!

Girl: How do you feel about abortion? Dad: Ask your sister Girl: I don’t have a …

Yo girl…do you like squirrels, because i’m about to nut in your hole

Whats the difference between a 12 year old girl and a freezer?

Only one screams when you put your meat in it.

There once was a brother and a sister so one night it’s storming really bad and the sister goes into the brothers room and asks " can I stay with you tonight because I’m scared" the brother replies with " yea sure but just don’t tell Mom" so the girl climbs into the bed and looks under the sheets to see the boys penis and asks “what’s that?” And the boy replies with “that’s my pet snake” and the girl asks “can I pet it?” And the boy says “sure just don’t tell Mom” and the boy falls asleep and wakes up in a hospital and asks “what happened” and the girl said “I pet the snake but it spit on me so I bit it’s head off”

What’s similar b/w a pregnant 14 y/o girl and the foetus inside of her?

They both are thinking “My mom’s gonna kill me”

I saw a guy raping a girl in the park so I decided to help. She didn’t stand a chance against the two of us.

What turns a girl on more than having sex with her

When she finds out that you have a vibrator too

What does a girl want more than anything in the world? – Nothing. She’s fine.

What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs? Names.

What do TVs and girls have in common ? They both show you stuff when you turn them on!

Dirty Joke: A boy fell in the mud.

Clean Joke: He took a bath with bubbles.

Dirty Joke: Bubbles was the girl next door.

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