A guy told a beautiful girl, "Hey, I want to make love to you. If I throw $2000 when you go to pick it up, that's when I'll go. Is that okay?"
She called her husband, and he said, "Okay, but pick it up fast so he doesn't have time to pull his pants down."
Four hours later, she shows up to her house and tells her husband, "THAT FUCKER PAID IN COINS!"
Three guys are standing in an alley on an alien planet, and the psycho one says, "However many tits your girl has is how many balls you have!"
The first guy says, "Ha! My girlfriend has six! I'm racked up!" The second guy said, "Eh, I am happy with two balls." The third guy said, "Shit! My girlfriend is flat as fuck!"
A guy listening in enters and says, "Bro, you actually have girlfriends. I do not. Does that mean I have a pussy?"
There was one girl. She met 5000 guys. She had sex with each of them seven times. She became... - flip screen (=).
When I was very young...
My classmates played a game called kiss chase. Some were really good at catching the girls and then kissing them.
They are rapists now.
These two guys were at a bar flirting with these girls. The guy says, "Are you a parking ticket, 'cause you got fine written all over you?"
The girl turns and says, "How about you pay for them, and then I can pay you back with me getting all over you?"
Hey girl, are you osteoporosis, because you're giving me a "bone" condition.
Mississippi girls are missing a "pp."
One day I was on my phone, then I got a text message from my girlfriend, "Hey, sexy boy, wanna hang out tonight if you know what I mean...?" Then I just stopped and froze. I read the message. I said, "Yeah, sure..." She replied really fast, "There's going to be a few people there, ok." But I didn't read the next message... She said, "Come right at 12:00 AM." But I didn't read it. I walked into her house, but I heard a strange noise like a moaning noise, and it sounded like HER!! So I hid behind the couch, and I looked through the open door and saw something I didn't want to see... Like for part 2 and comment if you want me to make another!!
But she hasn't tried the position with her new boyfriend, so she invites him to a romantic dinner.
After dinner, she tells her boyfriend about her desire for it, but her boyfriend was clueless about such acts, so she tells him to strip naked on the couch and lay on top of him naked in the 69 position. She starts sucking him off and starts waiting for him to do the same, but the bf didn't know what to do, so he just lay there. Suddenly, the girl had an urge to fart but held it in because her asshole was right near his bf's face. Suddenly, she loses control and lets one out. She apologizes profusely and continues sucking him. A couple of minutes later, she feels the urge again and lets another fart rip near his face. The BF throws the girl from the couch, gets up, and says, "Bitch if you think I'll be lying here for 67 more of those, you're fucking crazy."
Why was the Tower of Pisa leaning? Because it wanted to look up a 10 year old girl’s skirt.
At gym class today, my friend made this song:
🎵 I’m a Barbie girl, I am fantastic, my boobs are plastic!
What did the girl with no hands get for her birthday?...
We don't know; she hasn't opened it yet.
Why do you only see girls in groups of 3, 5, 7, and 9?
Because they can’t even.
How do you call a virgin girl in Alabama? An orphan.
Girl, is your butt made of water, because it is tubig?
I am a fat girl.
A girl called me ugly.
So I drove over her with a car and called her flat.
"Let girls live" is 9 years old, OMG, right?
I watch sexy girls AMV and my pp goes up and down and up.
My friend's daughter is taking a job in California parking cars. She says she wants to be a valet girl. For sure. For sure.
