Why did the orphan try to get hurt?
Because then they would get surrounded with people who care about him.
He looks around, no one is there.
Get Jokes
What does a Rubik's cube and a man's penis have in common?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
Mom: I'm getting you a dog!
Me: OMG REALLY?!
Mom: Yeah, what gender do you want?
Me:...
Me: Bitch, please.
Why do orphans get to watch rated R movies? Because their parents can't stop them.
What do you call a disabled person who gets high?
Baked potato.
The Good Old Days.
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.
Women suck (GET IT?!)
Q: Why did the cat get arrested?
A: He was caught littering.
What is the difference between apples and orphans? Apples get picked!
Why did the suicidal man walk in front of the car? To get to the other side.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Q: Why did the cat get a ticket?
A: He was caught littering.
What's got 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves! Nah, just kidding... He still hasn't unwrapped his present.
What did the momma grape say to the pappa grape?
"Raisin' our kids is usually pretty fun, but sometimes they get sunburn and I have to take them to the doctor for dry skin."
Q: Why did the pervert cross the road?
A: Couldn't get his dick out of the chicken.
Q: Why do clowns always get into fights?
A: Because they have the balls to.
What is the similarity between orphans and apples?
They both get thrown out.
The most powerful thing in the world is babies. This is because they cry and get what every they want.
Why do bugs hate the internet?
Because they always get caught.
Get it? Inter-net?
What do you get when I get mixed with coffee?
De-presso.
