Get jokes
People keep telling me they hope Kenny never has kids.
I don't think that's a worry. His mom is much too old to get pregnant.
Jack and Jill went up a hill to fetch a pal of water. Me: incorrect, two pals of water, one to refresh from running up a hill and the one you went to get. I’m sick af from these stories.
What's the difference between orphans and apples?
Apples get picked.
A lady walks into a dentist's office, sits on the counter, and spreads her legs. The dentist says, "I think you have the wrong idea." The lady replies, "Last week you gave my husband his false teeth; now you can get them out."
What did one fish say to the other?
Keep your mouth shut and you'll never get caught.
Memes
Three men walk into heaven at the same time. They all live in the same city. God asks the first man, "How did you die?" The man says, "I have a heart condition, and I've been suspecting my wife of cheating for some time. Anyway, I get home from work and I see my wife on the bed and a man hanging off the balcony. I get so mad and stomp on the guy's fingers! He falls into a bush, so I throw a refrigerator on him." God asks the next man, "How did you die?" The man says, "I was cleaning the windows, and then this crazy man starts stomping on my fingers! Luckily, I fall safely in a bush! But then a refrigerator falls on me!" God asks the third man, and he says, "I was the one in the fridge!"
Why did the octopus cross the road?
To get to the other TIDE!!! 🤣🐙🐙
How do you get away with rape? Identify as transgender. Women can never be accused of rape, obviously
What happens at night in Bangladesh?
It gets Dhaka.
Dark humor is just like food, not everybody gets it.
Do you know why pedos get away with molesting orphans? Who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.
How do you know when your girlfriend is too young?
You have to make airplane noises to get her to open her mouth.
Sorry.
Why did Cinderella get kicked off the soccer team? Because she ran away from the ball.
I will never forget my girlfriend's last words... "Get off of me! STOP!" *slurp*... Dead.
How much pussy does a priest get? None.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What's the difference between an American school and a shooting range?
My dick doesn't get hard at the shooting range.
How do you get a slag from Dundee pregnant?
Spunk in the gutter and let the flies do the work...
Q. What does Michael Jackson get his sex partners as a gift?
A. Crayons.
How do you get a black girl to suck your meat?
Put barbecue sauce on it.