Get jokes
It was my cousin's birthday and my mom said what should we get her? I said a rope.
Why is an orphan into worshiping Satan?
'Cause they get to call someone "master" and be freaky.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
The apples get picked.
I saw a kid in a wheelchair, and he was getting bullied. I said, "Stand up for yourself!"
What do you call getting assaulted by a gay man? Fruit punch.
Amber Heard Daily Routine:
Get out of bed, drink coffee, take a shit on Johnny Depp's bed.
Why did the impostor vent... to get to the other side?
Best thing ever right here.
So, there is this app on your phone called ringer. Go into it. There is a 12-15 digit number. Enter that into my phone, my dick will get 12-15 inches longer.
This isn't a joke but...
GET IN THE VAN, JANICE!
What do people get for Christmas when they behave badly? They get coal. Why coal, you're probably saying, because the true meaning is cucks of all kinds.
How do you get an emo out of the tree?
You cut the rope.
Stephen Hawking was a spac. But if you put an E on the end, you get space, and he loved that.
Little Johnny likes to play with toy guns.
Little Johnny paints them black.
Little Johnny went to a gun store.
Little Johnny made a big mess.
The cemetery people were getting paid.
What does a nosy pepper do?
Gets jalapeño business.
Teacher: Here, have candy.
Kid: No, I’m too fat.
Teacher: Shut up, or I’m gonna fail you.
*Next week*
Teacher: Okay kids, get off the floor and go back to your seats.
Kid: I’m too fat to get up.
Teacher: Don’t you remember what I said?
Kid: Yep, elephants don’t forget.
But he could only get 1 trade.
Son: Dad, what are those two huge balloons on mommy's chest?
Dad: I don't see balloons, but I see boobs. I mean, yes, balloons.
Son: Are you sure they're balloons? Yesterday I heard Uncle Frank trying to get a milk dispenser working.
Gwen, do you have to be so happy all the time? Even you don't get the joke!
What does a terrorist get for Christmas?
A C4.
What is an orphan and an apple?
They get picked.