Get jokes
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
What sits in the corner and gets smaller and smaller? A baby with a potato peeler.
So I was looking through my pictures and I found a picture of a random kid that took a picture of his ugly face. It looked like someone that got hit by a car, then a bus, then a semi.
That’s what I get for not having a password on my iPad.
What do you call a person who tries to get you on a dating website... a Brodie.
For a while, lead was used in pencils, but... we realised that it might not have been the smartest idea because it lead (badoom ching) to some people getting lead poisoning.
In life you either yeet or get yeeted, or you beat or get beaten.
I guess I failed.
What's an orphan's favorite sport?
Tennis because it's the only love they'll get.
What time is it when you get home, can you walk walk home and walk walk home to get a car? I love you, you're the night!
What name do you get if you mix the names Chris and Marisa?
Then you get the name Chrisa.
So, three guys are walking carefully into a bar.
The bartender said, "What can I get you, gentlemen?"
What do you get when skeletons are dancing in a tin can?
Noise!
What do you do when an orphan gets you mad?
A stab to the neck and a bullet to the face.
What does a nosy pepper do?
Gets jalapeño business.
What does iCloud eat for lunch?
Your documents.
Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the “shell” station.
So 666-3629, so get it?
Why did the child cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
Does anyone know where I can get that picture that went around the internet of Steven Hawking looking at the stairway to Heaven and saying “Oh Fu-k”?
Kim Jong Il: Knock knock.
Political Prisoner: Who's there?
Kim Jong Il: Boo.
Political Prisoner: Boo who?
Kim Jong Il: Boo hoo? Don't cry just because I executed your wife and enslaved your children. You at least get to eat today, my friend.
What is the best revenge for getting punished at school?
Go shoot up the school.