Get jokes
How do people in Alabama get circumcised? You knee your sister's jaw...
Why do nuns go around in pairs?
So one nun makes sure the other nun doesn't get none!
Dad: "Honey, I'll be right back. I need to get some papers."
Me: "Okay." *Falls asleep.*
*Wakes up in an adoption center.*
Damn, it was those kind of papers.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the gay guy's house. Knock, knock. Who's there? Chicken.
How do you get 100 Pikachus on a bus?
- Pokémon
Why did Sally's pizza get cold? Because she has no arms.
NASA is going to probe Uranus, and it might take a while to get there.
Why did Alice from Wonderland get her butt stuck in the rabbit hole at first? Because she probably ate too many hamburgers and drank too much wine just out of nowhere, then told her butt to hold it in before more food pops out.
A sailor drops anchor in a port and heads into the nearest pub. Everyone in the pub is whispering and pointing at him because of his odd shaped body; he has a very muscular body, but a very tiny head on his shoulders.
As he orders his drink, he tells the bartender, "I'll explain. I get this in every port and town I visit. I caught a mermaid and she granted me three wishes if I would release her back into the sea. So I told her I wanted a yacht and, sure enough, she came through for me. Next, I asked for a million bucks and now I am set for life. Last of all, I asked her if I could have sex with her and her response was, 'I don't know how you can make love to me with your type of body.' So I asked her, 'How about a little head?'"
Hello, Brudas, my name Badabeeyeabolamazoqanba. I, forty-eight-year man from Somalia. Sorry for bad England. I sold my wife for internet connect, and I am level thirteen in Roblacks. If you want to get batter in Roblacks, contact me at Gmail@borakoobama. Send me your bank account information and password. Than I well give you all the cotton you desire. Sorry for bad spelling. I kindergarden dropout.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
Why can't orphans play Monopoly?
Because they never get a full house.
What do you get when a dinosaur farts?
A blast from the past!
What's the difference between an orphan and a dog?
A dog gets adopted.
Why do men midgets laugh when they run?
Because their balls get tickled by the grass.
My Mom said, "I have a daughter that killed herself for getting bullied."
Well, I said, "Have you seen her?"
Why don't orphans play GTA?
Because they're sad they don't get wanted!
What color is Sonic's ball?
Blue because he keeps getting rejected.
If you wait for a woman to get 9 months pregnant and kill her, you will never be able to stop the loop.
How do u get a depressed person out of a tree?
You cut the rope they hung themself in...