Get jokes

Why did the kidnapper cross the road?

To get the kids at the playground.

How do you get a baby in a box? With a blender.

What's the most expensive haircut you can get? Chemotherapy.

How did the orphan lose its parents?

Its parents never came back from getting milk.

Want to hear a joke?

My life. Get it?

Random guy: Come on, Bin Laden, time is ticking. Get it, ticking. OK, I'll leave.

I would have told you about a chemistry joke, but I wouldn't get a reaction.

What happens if you sit under a cow?

You get a pat on the head.

Does anybody know the similarities between a Rubik's cube and a penis?

I don't know the whole answer, but I do know that the more you play with it, the harder it gets.

What time is it when you eat a Christmas tree?

Time to get a new Christmas tree! 🎄

What time is it when you get home and you can walk walk home and walk walk?

Why did the scarecrow get an award? He was outstanding in his field. Okay, I'll admit it's corny.

What ankle is getting cut off of school? The lights.

There's a girl I like in my school, but she's always on her phone. It seems that I can't get a SIGNAL from her.

Why did the one-eyed chicken cross the road?

To get to Birds Eye.

What do you get when someone named Victoria falls? A Victoria Falls!

My mom told me to get dressed, and I said, "For what? Are we going to the rodeo?"

Q. What kind of school does an ice cream man go to?

A. Sunday school!

Psst! Don't understand? Well, "Sunday" sounds like "Sundae." Get it now? Nope? Sorry. Plus, it's an ice cream homophone joke.

There are 2 dads and 2 sons. They all caught a fish.

Why did they only come home with 3 fish?

(Answer)

There were a grand-dad, dad, and son.

If you don't get it, then it means grand father is the dad to the dad (1 dad). Dad is the dad for the son and a son for the grandfather. Get it?

How do mountains get big?

They go trick-or-treating.