What did Sally get for her birthday? A football!
Only joking; she hasn't opened the box yet.
Get Jokes
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Why don't ants get sick?
Because they have anty-bodies.
How do you get a million Pikachus in a bus?
You shove them on!
Kid: I want to be Batman.
Okay, when he gets home, his parents are dead.
How does the author of Harry Potter get around?
She walks, JK, Rowling!
What time do babies get dirty?
Playtime.
How did the tree get sick?
It got tinsel-itis.
Why do they have fences around cemeteries?
Because people are dying to get in.
What do you get when you eat a hamburger?
Mustard gas.
Money means nothing to me. Ask me for it, you will get nothing.
How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg?
Pick it up and suck its dick.
What color flowers do mama cats like to get?
Purrrrrrrple flowers.
Boy goes to Confession.
Boy: "What are you doing, Father?"
Priest: "It's called masturbation, and soon you will be doing it."
Boy: "Why do you say that, Father?"
Priest: "'Cause my hand is getting tired!"
-not my joke
I have a joke about chemistry, but I don't think it will get a reaction.
Guys, we should stop telling orphan jokes. Their parents will get mad. Oh...
Shorts go up, pants go down. Body to body, skin to skin. When it's sniff, stick it in. It goes in dry and comes out wet, And the longer it's in, the stronger it gets. It comes out dripping and starts to sag.
It's not what you think it is. It's a Lipton tea bag.
Get your mind together!
What does an armed bank robbery and Michael Jackson have in common?
Someone gets hurt.
Why did Michael Jackson cross the road?
To get to the opera.
So, Dora is having a sleepover with her cousin Diego at Dora's house. Later that night, Dora's mom hears someone screaming, "Go Diego go!" for at least a couple of minutes, and then it stops, and she goes back to sleep.
But then she hears the same thing a couple of minutes later, so she walks in and hears "Go Diego go!" She walks over to Diego's sleeping bag and looks, and it's empty, so she walks over to Dora's sleeping bag and looks in and sees Dora getting f
... by Diego and hears Dora saying, "Go Diego go!" while moaning.
