Game jokes
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they can't go home.
Why can't the orphan run past third base?
'Cause the orphan doesn't have a home to run to.
Why is England bad at chess?
'Cause they lost their queen.
Why can't orphans play poker?
Because they don't know what a full house is.
"Orange, orange, orange."
"Knock, knock."
"Orange."
"Orange you happy I didn't say orange again?"
Why did orphans play Poppy Playtime?
To get a family.
This one is for Gwen, I'm sorry people are so mean to you.
All the big cats gathered for a game of poker. Why did the tiger lose?
Because one of his opponents kept on lion. Another had a puma-nent poker face. But the real problem was the cheetah.
What if some kid was like, "I'm going to shoot up the school!", and then someone just pulls up with a reverse card?
Damn, this new Angry Birds is fire!
Your hairline is pushed back farther than G.T.A. 6.
Why can't fat kids play poker?
They eat all the chips.
Pokemon: What’s Wailmer’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
I wanted to play Fruit Ninja, but remembered I don’t have a phone. Guess I gotta draw fruit on my arm!
Mom, can I please go out and play?
... no answer.
My girlfriend was cheating in Uno.
She's not the only one who can play that game.
A skinny black person named "Treyvon Robinson" joins a pickup basketball game at the local court, trash-talking about his "superior athletic genes" while munching on a stolen bag of Skittles. The ref blows the whistle for a foul, and he argues, "That ain't fair, I'm just naturally dominant!"
But the team's coach, a burly black dude who's been eyeing him all game, grabs him by the jersey, blindfolds him with a sweaty headband, slathers lube from his gym bag all over, and pile-drives his ass courtside in a twisted BDSM slam dunk, yelling, "Now taste the rainbow, punk!"
What game do emo kids hate the most?
Life.
I just beat the Hollow Knight and found it takes 26 hours to beat it, but it took me 69 hours to beat it.
What did the baseball chief say to the Orphan?
GO HOME!
Do you know what the equivalent to hell is these days?
1. Listening to your teacher.
2. Not having your phone/game/TV.
3. Not having nicotine.