Game jokes
I have no puns because I don't play soccer.
Friend: Hey, did you catch that game last night? I did, it was so good! After that I went to Kane’s, because Kane's is amazing! What did you do this weekend? I did-
Me: Dude, are you the Terms and Conditions? Because I don’t give a fuck about what you say.
"Hi, Mrs. Jackson, can Matt come out and play?"
"Oh, Johnny, you know Matt doesn't have any arms or legs."
"I know, we just wanted to use him as third base."
I was remembering the time when I lost my brother, only until I heard that hide and seek wasn't the best idea, especially in a secluded parking lot in downtown.
My mama always told me, don't pick your nose or it will fall off! I thought she meant my nose.
Hey, give me a break! I'm a little shorthanded!
Oh no, not rock paper scissors again! I always lose. Come on guys, I just lost my finger a day ago! This is Tony, later on.
Q: What was Hellen Keller's favorite game as a kid?
A: Musical chairs.
Why did Sally get a black eye?
Because she tried to play patty cake.
Kid: Why do orphans like tennis?
Dad: Because it's the only time they get "love."
Kid 1: "Fortnite is good and Brawl Stars sucks!"
Me: Wow, I didn't know you were dyslexic.
I love to play catch with my dad! He's never there to catch the ball, though.
Me and my cancer
Are like a game of Fortnite.
I’ll never win.
What do you call a fish with a temper?
Undyne.
An elderly woman and an elderly man were at a retirement home.
The man was shuffling a deck of cards for a card game.
The man asks, "Is it your first time?"
The woman replies, "It's been a while since a man has asked me that."
Yo mama so short that when she plays mini golf, it's just called golf.
What Happens When You Get Caught On Fire?
— You Lost To Slmebody When You Were Playing Hide And Seek, And The Place Where You Got Caught Was Exactly On A Patch Of Fire.
Why do golfers always bring a spare pair of pants?
Because they always get a hole in one!
What do you call Stephen Hawking on his period?
Mario Kart.
Why don’t they play poker in the jungle?
Too many cheetahs.
What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball?
A guy will actually search for a golf ball.
Why did Suzy fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.
Knock knock. Who’s there? Not Suzy.