Furniture jokes
If you get a new bed, you have more bedroom, but less bedroom.
Yo hairline so far, that if you put tables on it, it would NEVER end.
"Chairing is caring, folks!"
You’re so short, you could sweep under your bed while standing.
You’re so short, you can swing your legs when you sit on a stool.
Memes
A chair came to life and said, "I'm alive!"
I said, "Yes, I know I am."
What's a chairmaker's favorite flavor?
Chair-y.
Yo mama is so fat, she gave a memory foam mattress Alzheimer's.
Yo mama is so fat that her wheelchair had to be made into a couch!
Why did the pillow cross the road?
To get to a mattress store!
My sister Wani is a dwarf, so I sit on her as a chair.
What did the cat say when he fell off the table?
MEOM!
Your mumma so fat she takes up 4 seats of the sofa.
Why couldn't the button get off the couch?
Because his butt weighed a ton! (butt-ton)
What does a human and a cat have in common? Both take my bed.
I lent my sister my bed. The next morning, she told me it worked like a dream.
Why did the chair file a restraining order?
The booty wouldn't stop cracking up!
What did the booty say to the chair?
"You complete me!"
What is green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls from a tree? A pool table.
How do you know when German people break into your house? When you can not find your bed.