Furniture jokes
What did Helen Keller's mother do to her when she was mad at her?
She left the plunger in the toilet, she put doorknobs on all the walls, and she rearranged the furniture.
A book just fell on my head. I’ve got only my shelf to blame!
Yo hairline so far, that if you put tables on it, it would NEVER end.
If you get a new bed, you have more bedroom, but less bedroom.
"Chairing is caring, folks!"
Memes
I couldn't find my cat, and then my pillow started meowing.
Yo momma so fat, I asked her to save me a seat, so she sat down and she saved 10, and one by one the legs started popping off.
You’re so short, you could sweep under your bed while standing.
You’re so short, you can swing your legs when you sit on a stool.
A chair came to life and said, "I'm alive!"
I said, "Yes, I know I am."
What's a chairmaker's favorite flavor?
Chair-y.
Why did the pillow cross the road?
To get to a mattress store!
Your mumma so fat she takes up 4 seats of the sofa.
What did the cat say when he fell off the table?
MEOM!
My sister Wani is a dwarf, so I sit on her as a chair.
Why couldn't the button get off the couch?
Because his butt weighed a ton! (butt-ton)
What does a human and a cat have in common? Both take my bed.
I lent my sister my bed. The next morning, she told me it worked like a dream.
Why did the chair file a restraining order?
The booty wouldn't stop cracking up!
What did the booty say to the chair?
"You complete me!"