Funny jokes
Rape jokes aren’t funny. People like me that are actually victims of rape are triggered by them.
What do Jamaicans say when they touch a cactus?
Pokemon!
I got pranked so many times. Once I saw two wheels rolling down the street. I heard this noise. I looked behind me. There's a legless man in a wheelless chair screaming, "HELP! I CAN'T GO ANYWHERE!" but I walked away. I knew it was a prank.
Two lions plan their escape from the circus. The night they get out of their cages, they see a lone clown stumbling back from town, drunk, not a soul in sight. Since they are going on the run, they decide to catch one last meal before they hit the road.
As one lion gets a bite of leg, the second takes a piece of shoulder.
Then one stops and asks his companion:
"Does this taste funny to you?"
Why is 69 annoying me? Oh, it's a tease.
"Why did the band teacher get arrested?"
"For fingering a minor." Ahaha, so funny!
What happens when a skeleton does not laugh at your pun?
Looks like someone's funny bone is broken. 😁
Q: What breed of dog is supposed to laugh at all of your jokes?
A: A Chihuahua.
Why did ranch tell fridge to close the door?
He was dressing.
The moment when you tell an illegal immigrant to go home and he walks to the jail cell and closes it.
A list of Sans puns would be Sans-tastic!
What's the difference between your mom and your dad? One leaves your life to go get milk, and the other cleans up after you, feeds you, and does your laundry.
Little Johnny got a train set for Christmas. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says, "Alright, you motherfuckers get off here, and you motherfuckers get off here." His mom comes rushing in and says, "Little Johnny, we don’t use that kind of language, go to your room and think about what you did!"
After a few hours, she lets him out of his room. He goes back to play with his train set. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says, "Okay, you guys get off here, and you guys get off here. And if you have any complaints about the two hour delay, take it up with the bitch in the kitchen."
My Italian chef friend died last week. He pasta away.
People, please check out Tenya's jokes. Girl, love, cheetah, blue jokes!
Guys, this is not funny. Stop.
I bought a horse and named him Mayo.
Sometimes Mayo neighs.
A little boy and a little girl were taking a bath.
The little girl looked down and said, "What's that?"
"That's my little red sports car," said the little boy.
The little boy looked down and said, "What's that?"
"That's my little red sports car garage," said the little girl.
A few seconds later, the little girl said, "How about you put your little red sports car in my little red sports car garage?"
"Sure," said the little boy.
The little boy's mother was downstairs and heard this blood curdling scream. She ran upstairs. Once she got there, she saw blood all over the bathtub. "What happened?!" she said.
"Well, Johnny tried to put his little red sports car in my little red sports car garage...but it didn't fit...so I cut the back wheels off..."
Chuck Norris can gargle peanut butter.
A funny joke:
Knock knock. "Who's there?" Who. "Who who?" Ha, who who, you sound like an owl! "Fuck you!"