Funny jokes
My friend was in a wheelchair, so I rolled him in fire. Now I call him Hot Wheels.
I hear you like funny people. In fact, my whole life's a joke!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Mama.
Big Mama. Big Mama can't fit through the door.
Go up to your friend and say: "It smells like updog."
They will likely reply: "What's updog?"
To which you reply: "Nothing much, what about you?"
My wife accused me of being immature, so I kicked her out of my "boys fort."
Ok, this is a texting joke. This isn't my joke; I found it on Google.
Mom: SON YOURE G-MOM JUST PASSED AWAY lol
Son: Mom, how is that funny?!?! I hope you're not laughing!
Mom: OH NO I THOUGHT LOL MEANT LAUGHING OUT LOUD
I used to have a skeleton of jokes, now my supply is bone dry. Guess I wasn’t that femurous.
Once, I tried to say, "P.P. That's funny right there." Instead, I said, you guessed it, "Penis!"
You know, being a bitch is hard... but I found the person who's up for the challenge... you.
So, you're human, huh? Well, I'm a skeleton, so not much gets under my skin.
What did one skeleton say to the other?
Skeleton 1: "I need a hand!"
Skeleton 2: (Throws up hand)
Skeleton 1: "That wasn't very humerus."
Skeleton 2: "Why do you have to be so heartless?"
Skeleton 1: "At least I had the guts to tell you!"
Q: What's brown and sticky?
A: A stick :)
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
Because she'll let it go!
Why can’t you tell a funny joke to a wheelchair kid? Because he just rolls with the joke.
Tigger was playing hide & seek, so he looked in the toilet, but all he found was Pooh.
Why are orphans terrible at baseball? They never get home runs.
Tell someone that you're gonna say “I 1 poopoo” and it will go in order of numbers, so they say, “I 2 poopoo” & so on:
You) I 1 poopoo
(Them) I 2 poopoo
(You) I 3 poopoo
(Them) I 4 poopoo
(You) I 5 poopoo
(Them) I 6 poopoo
(You) I 7 poopoo
(Them) I 8 poopoo
And be like, “You ate poopoo??! EWW!!”
What do you call a cow with 2 legs?
Lean beef.
Funny jokes are like kids with autism.
They have special needs to make them.
Guys, these jokes are not funny. My dad died, he was the best Arabic pilot ever.