Funny jokes
A prisoner dug out of prison. He appeared in a playground. He said, "I'm free, I'm free!" A kid said, "So what? I'm four."
Go up to your friend and say: "It smells like updog."
They will likely reply: "What's updog?"
To which you reply: "Nothing much, what about you?"
I hear you like funny people. In fact, my whole life's a joke!
My friend was in a wheelchair, so I rolled him in fire. Now I call him Hot Wheels.
My wife accused me of being immature, so I kicked her out of my "boys fort."
wear sweatpants.
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
Because she'll let it go!
What did one skeleton say to the other?
Skeleton 1: "I need a hand!"
Skeleton 2: (Throws up hand)
Skeleton 1: "That wasn't very humerus."
Skeleton 2: "Why do you have to be so heartless?"
Skeleton 1: "At least I had the guts to tell you!"
Why can’t you tell a funny joke to a wheelchair kid? Because he just rolls with the joke.
Why are orphans terrible at baseball? They never get home runs.
Tigger was playing hide & seek, so he looked in the toilet, but all he found was Pooh.
How do you know your sister’s on her period? Your sister pussy taste funny
You're so fat,
when you stepped on the scale,
Buzz Lightyear came out and said,
"To infinity and beyond!"
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your parents :) so kawaii fr.
Q: What's brown and sticky?
A: A stick :)
So, you're human, huh? Well, I'm a skeleton, so not much gets under my skin.
You know, being a bitch is hard... but I found the person who's up for the challenge... you.
I used to have a skeleton of jokes, now my supply is bone dry. Guess I wasn’t that femurous.
Once, I tried to say, "P.P. That's funny right there." Instead, I said, you guessed it, "Penis!"
Tell someone that you're gonna say “I 1 poopoo” and it will go in order of numbers, so they say, “I 2 poopoo” & so on:
You) I 1 poopoo
(Them) I 2 poopoo
(You) I 3 poopoo
(Them) I 4 poopoo
(You) I 5 poopoo
(Them) I 6 poopoo
(You) I 7 poopoo
(Them) I 8 poopoo
And be like, “You ate poopoo??! EWW!!”
What do you call a cow with 2 legs?
Lean beef.