Funny jokes

So, you're human, huh? Well, I'm a skeleton, so not much gets under my skin.

Women have less rights than a NASCAR track.

Ok, this is a texting joke. This isn't my joke; I found it on Google.

Mom: SON YOURE G-MOM JUST PASSED AWAY lol

Son: Mom, how is that funny?!?! I hope you're not laughing!

Mom: OH NO I THOUGHT LOL MEANT LAUGHING OUT LOUD

Once, I tried to say, "P.P. That's funny right there." Instead, I said, you guessed it, "Penis!"

You know, being a bitch is hard... but I found the person who's up for the challenge... you.

I used to have a skeleton of jokes, now my supply is bone dry. Guess I wasn’t that femurous.

Why are orphans terrible at baseball? They never get home runs.

Tigger was playing hide & seek, so he looked in the toilet, but all he found was Pooh.

Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?

Because she'll let it go!

Why can’t you tell a funny joke to a wheelchair kid? Because he just rolls with the joke.

What did one skeleton say to the other?

Skeleton 1: "I need a hand!"

Skeleton 2: (Throws up hand)

Skeleton 1: "That wasn't very humerus."

Skeleton 2: "Why do you have to be so heartless?"

Skeleton 1: "At least I had the guts to tell you!"

Q: What's brown and sticky?

A: A stick :)

How do you know your sister’s on her period? Your sister pussy taste funny

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Not your parents :) so kawaii fr.

You're so fat,

when you stepped on the scale,

Buzz Lightyear came out and said,

"To infinity and beyond!"

You have a problem with jokes about dementia? That's funny, I don't remember asking.

What’s the difference between life and a rape joke?

Life fucks you until you stop breathing; a rape joke fucks you until it’s not funny anymore.

Tell someone that you're gonna say “I 1 poopoo” and it will go in order of numbers, so they say, “I 2 poopoo” & so on:

You) I 1 poopoo

(Them) I 2 poopoo

(You) I 3 poopoo

(Them) I 4 poopoo

(You) I 5 poopoo

(Them) I 6 poopoo

(You) I 7 poopoo

(Them) I 8 poopoo

And be like, “You ate poopoo??! EWW!!”

What do you call a cow with 2 legs?

Lean beef.

Funny jokes are like kids with autism.

They have special needs to make them.