Funny jokes

A priest, a pedo, and a rapist walk into a bar and that's just the first guy.

Why is the day you do laundry, cook, clean, iron, and so on called a day off?

I told my dad, "I just thought of something funny." He said, "Your face?"

Why can’t you tell a funny joke to a wheelchair kid? Because he just rolls with the joke.

My friend told me an emo joke once, and I said, "Emo jokes aren't funny, cut it out!"

Tibia honest, it takes a lot of spine to memorize all the bones in the skeletal system. I mean, there's a skele-ton of em! You gotta be boned up for the skeletal system exam, buddy chum pal. Now that was a humerus ribtickling skelepun. Besides, if ya don't know all of the bones in the skeletal system, get boned, fucking numbskull. Did those tickle your funny bone? Now I've been working down to the bone typing these puns, kid. Now if you hate all these, I won't be bothered, I got thick skin! But first, lemme take a skelfie in the skelevator playing my trom-bone. Now, I gotta go to Grillby's. They got a discount on spare-ribs. Bone-voyage, my homeslice breadslice dawg.

There was a penguin breathing with his ass. One day, he sat down and he died.

Really funny jokes at https://www.ranker.com/list/duck-jokes/jack-napier

One of the reasons the skeleton was not allowed to play church music is because he had no organs.

So, a person walked into a shop.

Shop guy: "Hey RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD."

This is REALLY funny.

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Thank you very much.

Where are people sent to die?

Ross Hall academy.

Why was the Chinese laundry joke not funny? It had no irony.

Why did the shark spit out the clown?

Because he tasted funny!

Tell someone to say "alpha" and then "kenny one". Tell them to say it very fast. Tell them it sounded like they said, "I'll fuck anyone!"

What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball?

A guy will actually search for a golf ball.

So I was at the store and I saw a pretty woman, and I said, "Hi."

Quickly, she said, "I am not interested. I have a husband."

And when I saw the woman again, she said, "I need help."

I said, "No, call your husband!" KARMA. 😂😜

Is your refrigerator running? "Yeah, I guess." Well, you better go catch it! Haha, I'm a girl, it's funny!

A paraplegic walks into a bar...

It's funny because he can't walk.

Sans, you lazybones, get up and do something.

Sans: I am doing something.

Papyrus: Oh yeah, what?

Sans: Thinking up a skele-ton of jokes.

Papyrus: SANSSSsSsSsSssSsSSsSsSsSSsSSsSsSsS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I will end you.

Sans: What, does someone not have a funny bone? Oh wait, do you have a bone to pick with me? I have 206.

There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe.

He woke up at night, with a terrible fright, to find out his dream had come true.