Who do you call in times of a marriage crisis?
A prostitute, because your wife fucking sucks.
What did one Justin say to the other Justin? - Fuck you
I FUCKED A POKEMON THE OTHER DAY. IT IS DEAD NOW
What did the pornstar say to the unemployed homeless man?
Get a fucking job.
greg fucking steals toes!
i fucked your mom, that's why i've been paying your life support since you were born
Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.
What don't blind people like bungee jumping?
Because it scares the fuck out of dogs!
Little Johnny asks, "Mommy, where do babies come from?"
His mother replies, "The stork brings them."
Little Johnny, puzzled, asks, "Then who fucks the stork?"
Have you ever tried sex when camping?
It's f***ing intense.
I saw a fortune teller the other day. She told me I would come into some money.
Last night, I fucked a chick named Penny. What are the odds?
