Friends jokes

Friend: "You are so ugly." Me: "You can't be talking, you give Freddy Krueger nightmares."

A friend was doing bird puns on me. Then I realized that toucan play at that game.

I was talking to my Welsh friend the other day, and he suddenly started talking Welsh to me then collapsed after the first few sentences. Turns out he had a stroke.

My friend lives in a caravan park. His parents named him Money because they thought it was a type of currency.

My dumb ass thinking I made a friend, oh ya, I forgot, literally nobody likes me!

A couple and their friends were riding their tricycle, and one wheel fell off. They discussed what to do, and finally the friend said, "Why don't you just use me?" The boyfriend said, "Why did I not think of using the third wheel?"

Denki: Hey Mineta, I have a joke.

Mineta: ...go on...

Denki: Ochako's booty.

Mineta: I don't get it?

Denki: Exactly.

Mineta: *cries T_T*

"I told my black friend a joke. I told him he needs to lighten up!"

Two friends were walking in a forest. They started to fight.

A cannibal came and shouted, "Food fight!"

My Italian chef friend died last week. He pasta away.

I had to go to my friend's house.

I went in her basement and I saw taped mouths that are KIDS in the basement... Is my friend OK???

Today my stoner friend used my to-do list as a blunt wrap.

He was high on my list of priorities.

Thanks Ethan for all you've done. We've both made mistakes when all is said and done, but just thanks for being a good friend. This is officially my last post on here, Ethan-Real 1.

I can’t watch anime anymore when my friend’s grandpa is in the house.

He hasn’t heard a Japanese person scream since the war.

Why can't fat kids play poker?

They eat all the chips.

My mom: If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you?

Me: No.

Attack on Titan music starts playing in my head.

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."

Your hairline is so far back it was friends with the dinosaurs!

When you're playing online with your friend, then you hear a kid scream: "No, Dad, please stop!" Scream ends with a gunshot.

Me and my friend were roasting each other. She said, "You look like a Reese's cup." I replied, "You're so old, your pubic hairs are 50 shades of gray."