What's the best way to tell your friend you hate them? Option 1: Kill them. Option 2: Walk away. Option 3: Kill each other.
Me: Why can't I just kms and leave them the pain?
Friends Jokes
My friend asked me why I haven’t had milk in six years.
I told him my dad never came back with it.
My crush's best friend came up to me and called me my crush's dog 🐕, so then I say, "Wow, you're an ass for calling me a bitch." He then looks at me wide-eyed, and I just walk away.
Person: My left ear is ringing.
Friend: Then answer it!
It's important to have a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between "antidote" and "anecdote," one of my best friends would still be alive.
Who's Paul Walker's close friend?
Tree.
My Emo friend was coming over to my house. When he got there, he said, "Got a rope?" I asked why, and he said, "I want to make a swing."
Me walking away after committing murder in a school with my trusty “friend”.
Did you hear about that one guy who dipped his balls in paint?
My friend said they were “Pretty nuts!”
If y'all look up freshfry jokes, I'll come up. About a year ago, I had a bunch of friends on this app.
Jonny went fishing and he didn’t know how to cast his pole, and he asked his friend Joe how to cast it. Then when he cast, he only cast 3 feet, and he never learned how to do it.
One day I went to talk to my friend.
"Hi John!" I said.
No response.
"Oh, yeah."
I went to pick up the remote and clicked the unmute button.
"Hope that helps!"
What did the lettuce say to the carrot?
"Lettuce be friends!"
I was crying at school because my grandpa died. My friends asked what his last words were. I told them his last words were, "Are you still holding the ladder?"
One of my friends got a haircut, and everyone giggled and bullied him... I didn’t, I died of laughter 😂
My friend: Hey, why are you always smiling?
Me: 'Cause life is a joke and we’re all slacking it off.
Mother: If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you follow?
Me: Leads a marching parade off the Golden Gate Bridge.
My friend died. Me and my other bestie start singing the coffin song. My bestie in the coffin, why are you not sad? Why are you still alive?
Me: What do you call an orphan?
Friend: Homeless.
What do you call a group of emo kids? Suicide squad.
