on this website, I just searched up "My jokes". In response, it said, "no jokes found". Wth.
Whats the dame about boxes and children. There both found in basements
While I was walking on the road, a cat crossed my road, and 5min later I found fell it in gutter
So I went to the gym and I found a hymm
i lost my virginity once and found it in a store being sold off
Very sad today found my pet mouse ' Elvis ' dead this morning, he was caught in a trap .
What's the difference between Palestine and yo mama? Yo mama can be found on Google maps.
Your mum is so fat when she reached for the remote and when she found it it was crushed
(Not originally my joke, I found this joke somewhere a few months back) An Emo kid in a tree falls, at the same time an apple falls from the same tree, what hits the ground first? The apple would be due to the kids rope and noose.
What is found under Michael Jacksons pillow? Billies-jeans
"The rise of atheism is going to lead to a break down of social morals and lead to all kinds of filth including an increase in child abuse" said the village priest. The village scientists did some fact checking. In prison they found roughly 70% of child abusers were hyper religious before committing the crimes, and another 20% converted to religions to look 'remorseful'. The remaining 10% preferred not to say. They presented the findings to the media. "Scientists slander good religious folk and ignore the weight of evidence!" "Is Science biased against religion? You decide in this survey". they reported
The village priest is living at his majesties convenience and tells the others he committed armed robbery.
"Why is this a joke, its not even funny?" Said the person reading this, breaking the forth wall.
What is funny is you got to the end of this post and didn't cringe. Why not?
I found someone's hairline. It was on the western front.
I just beat the hollow knight and found it takes 26hr to beat it but it took me 69hr to beat it
What’s bin Laden got in common with SpongeBob?
Both can be found at the bottom of the sea, and they’re filled with holes.
What happens when an orphan is told that someone had found their parents? They cry... They scream.. with joy "Oh wait, no, that wasn't your parents" Orphan grabs a knife out of the kitchen, lets just say, the orphan didnt live to tell the tail...
What is similar between a ton of kids and some boxes
Both of those are commonly found in basements
When I found out that my toaster wasn’t waterproof, I was shocked.
My grandpa lost his toe today😔.....nvm we found it's in his TOEtruck
_How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her? She found another woman's lipstick on his knuckles.
btw friend here also wants to do suicide
friend:why did i cross the road??? me:to get to the other side. friend:true!
friend:hey lets go hang out at the forest today! me:ok *grabs ropes for the both of us and rushes outside bc this is a lucky day* friend:hey atleast we did it!
friend:whats the best thing about me? me:you will eventually end. friend:hmmmmmm . . . true!
friend:what historical time influenced you the most? me:the great depression
if i could be an object id be glass because im see through and i can shatter with the minimum difficulty immediately!
my parents sometimes say im their sunshine! . . . because im painful if you look at me.
teacher:what does km/s mean? me+like almost all of the class:*in unison* it means kill myself but misspelled
friend:whats the best way to end a game? me:with death friend: . . . hmmm now that you think about it yeah! thats the best way!
when your about to jump down a cliff but you realize that you cant litter there
google says that your about 75% water but im make of 101% depression 101% anxiety 101% suicidal 101% stress
brain be like will_to_live.exe, happiness.exe, and many more others not found also you have now got crippling_depression.exe, anxiety.exe, suicide_thoughts.exe, suicide_attempts, and stressful_life.exe so so so much many more
how do you keep weeds away? just put a bucket of crippling depression and suicidal thought and attempts in the soil and then they just kill themselves. problem solved.
when you take antidepressants but they dont work it will just make you more depressed and thats a fact
a bored depressed suicidal person:*sees a dying person* dying person:p-l-pls c-c-c-call m-me a-an amb-b-bulancccee *wheeze* *dies* bored depressed suicidal person:hmmmm ur an ambulance dying person:*manages to get back up* bored depressed suicidal person:oooooohh goddddd dying person:*in a demonic tone* BUT NOT FOR ME~
roses are red inside im dead i have crippling depression some one pls shoot my head
when you finally open up to a person who you think will care and understand but it turns out that they dont you:*panickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanicking*
the only time you should lift your spirits up is when your gonna hang yourself
a made up story starting now so i went to school as usual theres a school shooting all the depressed suicidal people:*crave death* *walks up to shooter* all say KILL ME a made up story starting ending
in this one the friend isnt suicidal friend:wanna play a game? me:life wait no a game has a meaning friend: . . . *crickets* friend:calls suicide hotline me:wait no!!!!!
me:*has crippling depression* *asks mom why i was born* mom:hmmm i think i was drunk and on a lotta drugs me:hmmm tysm *gets the rope* mom:*making hanging puns* me:*hurries to the trash truck*
me:at this point ive lived about a decade depressed and suicidal that i dont struggle with it now, im good at it and its all normal
hope you enjoyed