Found Jokes

What's the same about boxes and children?

They're both found in basements.

I was digging and found some gold. I was going to tell my mom, then I remembered why I was digging.

Once, my father came home and found me in front of a roaring fire.

That made my father very mad, as we didn't have a fireplace.

Yo hairline go so far back that you dad found it before you did

One man's trash is another man's treasure he said when he found out his parents split up and is adopted

New SCP has been found!

An image shows a grey hallway with a sign reading 'HC 07'. A digital rendering of Ralsei from Deltarune stands in the hallway. To the right is a wojak pointing, wearing an 'SCP' patch on his suit. There is a username at the bottom that reads '@ralsei_enthusiast'.

Did you hear about the cello player who dreamed he was performing Bolero?

He woke up and found out it was true.

I found a key that works for every door at my school.

I was digging outside and I found my child's old toy, so I ran to find him, but I could not find him, so I was searching for about 6 hours, but then I remembered why I was digging......

Q: What is found deep inside of us, and the more we express our love for each other the more it spreads throughout the world?

A: Covid.

"Ring Ring! Hi, I've been needing to call you. Your hairline has been found by Dora after 25 years!"

Once, my father came home and found me in front of a roaring fire.

That made my father very mad, as we didn’t have a fireplace.

I found Jeffrey Epstein’s diary the other day.

The last entry was about 12 years old.

What is the origin of the glory hole?

The origins can be found in San Francisco, California, where historians claim that a meat thermometer was sticking out of a hole from both sides, especially the divider between bathroom stalls inside the men's restroom used for an anonymous massage for gay men by gay men in San Francisco, CA, in the Wild West.

A guy gives labor to a baby girl and a boy twins. The doctor said but the lady was like,

"Ugh, why do I need my husband to be in labor and I want a girl, not a boy, just a girl!"

The lady passed out 😵 and then found out she was in a coma. The man who was in labor died. The two babies got a nanny, an evil one. The nanny killed the babies on their first birthday.

A teacher was teaching her second-grade class about the government, so for homework that one day, she told her students to ask their parents what the government is. When Little Johnny got home that day, he went up to his dad and asked him what the government was. His dad thought for a while and answered, “Look at it this way: I'm the president, your mom is Congress, your maid is the workforce, you are the people and your baby brother is the future.”

“I still don't get it,” responded Little Johnny. “Why don't you sleep on it then? Maybe you'll understand it better,” said the dad. “Okay then...good night,” said Little Johnny and went off to bed. In the middle of the night, Little Johnny was awakened by his baby brother's crying. He went to his baby brother's crib and found that his baby brother had taken a crap in his diaper. So Little Johnny went to his parent's room to get help. When he got to his parent's bedroom, he looked through the keyhole to check if his parents were asleep. Through the keyhole, he saw his mom loudly snoring, but his dad wasn't there. So he went to the maid's room. When he looked through the maid's room keyhole, he saw his dad having sex with his maid. Little Johnny was surprised, but then he just realized something and thinks aloud, "OH!! Now I understand the government! The President is screwing the workforce, Congress is fast asleep, nobody cares about the people, and the future is full of s**t!"